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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29202132">Miscommunication - A MarkJae School AU</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melipierocks/pseuds/Melipierocks'>Melipierocks</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>GOT7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - High School, Bullying, Enemies to Friends, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Neglect, Sad, Sweet</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 05:07:56</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>34,122</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29202132</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Melipierocks/pseuds/Melipierocks</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Originally posted on @kship_au in 2018.</p><p>Youngjae is a senior in High School who just wants to graduate and be done with it. While he’s mostly invisible during school, his whole world changes when he confronts the bully who picks on the new foreign exchange student.</p><p> </p><p>[I've decided to re-upload this AU on AO3 to have it properly organized. Originally it was posted in screenshots.]</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Choi Youngjae/Mark Tuan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>19</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Part 1-5</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>WARNING:</p><p>While I plan for mostly a nice and sweet friendship/relationship with all the boys, this story will include topics like bullying, homophobia, neglect and violence. As per usual, my stories can include harsh language, but no derogatory terms.<br/>This is a complete work of fiction and has no connection to the boys.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     The first signs of day had begun to appear through the windows, casting a faint light onto the still-made bed. No, Youngjae had never made it to his bed, for his English assignment had kept him up almost all night. When he finished he let his head fall on top of his desk and right there is where he soundly slept. It felt as if as soon as his eyes closed that his alarm started ringing. He would have believed he hadn’t slept at all if it wasn’t for the small pool of drool on his wooden desk.</p><p>     Youngjae sat up, his back cracking loudly, and he cursed knowing his soreness would follow him all day. He sat there, still dazed as his phone’s alarm kept ringing and ringing until it automatically snoozed. He had 5 minutes to mentally prepare for it to ring again, but in his state he couldn’t even tell what day it was. He stared at the lightbulb of his desktop lamp, and how it shone down onto his pile of papers and scattered notebooks. It was then he remembered who he was, what day it was and what it all meant. He was Choi Youngjae, a senior in High School, completely knee-deep  in work; it was Wednesday, which meant when he’d get back home tonight it would be the same story, homework. And what did it mean? The alarm rang before Youngjae even considered asking himself that. Whatever it meant, whatever it was all for, he didn’t care, all he knew was that this was the final stretch and that soon he would be done with High School. He held on to that thought, refusing to think of what he would do after. His alarm had already stopped ringing, and he had to get up, or else he’d be late for the first bell.</p><p>     After a quick warm shower, Youngjae hopped into his school uniform, drowsiness causing him to struggle with the buttons of his shirt. He put on his tie, carefully tucking it in as he layered his blazer on top. He could do this in his sleep, his mother claims she’s seen it.</p><p>     Once he placed his notebooks and textbooks into his backpack, triple-checking that his assignments were printed and in the bag, he slung it on his back and made his way down the stairs. The sound of his mother in the kitchen, making as much noise as humanly possible, and his dad pacing around putting on his tie and his cufflinks after complaining about misplacing them, this was a normal day for Youngjae. His parents were both lawyers, and planned to make their son follow their line of work, no matter what Youngjae wanted.</p><p>     His eyes shifted to the jet-black piano in the living room, covered in dust. Its been so long since Youngjae played, he convinced himself that he had forgotten how to by now.</p><p>     His father paced in front of him one last time before sitting at the table, bringing Youngjae out of his trance. He made his way to the kitchen, and as soon as he did his mother handed over his lunchbox.</p><p>     “Good morning!” his mother said focusing more on pouring coffees than Youngjae. “Are you going to join us for breakfast today?”</p><p>     Youngjae observed her as she frantically went to the table placing the coffee mugs. “I need to get going or I’ll be late… sorry.” He added to make it seem like he was sad that he couldn’t join them, and pretended not to notice the table was only set for two.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>     The classroom slowly became an uproar as more students piled in talking about random topics like the weather and whatever drama was on TV the night before. Youngjae slowly sat up after falling asleep on his desk. He had arrived before the sun had completely come up, surprised that students had arrived before him.</p><p>     “Choi Youngjae,” he heard a voice next to him, it took him a second to register who it was and what was happening, but as he looked up he was greeted by the smug grin of none other than the infamous Park Jinyoung. “Rough night, huh? Must be tough to keep up with the rest of us.” Next to him appeared his tail and lackey Kim Yugyeom, sticking his tongue out as he spoke.</p><p>     Youngjae just stared at them, too exhausted to try to answer. Though he wasn’t too far behind in ranks, Jinyoung had been in second place since freshman year, so he had to admit he was right. But then again, he had no real urge to try to catch up, all he had to do was pass the remaining exams and go to college in the spring. So despite the constant teasing from Park Jinyoung, Youngjae was indifferent to his words.</p><p>     “Jinyoung-ah, Yugyeom-ah, why do you two always try to get into trouble?” said Im Jaebum, without even looking away from his books. Jaebum was not only first in the class, but he was also the class president. While he rarely spoke and kept to himself, he made sure to contain Jinyoung and Yugyeom. Park reluctantly always listened to whatever he’d say, and the other would always follow.</p><p>     As their teacher opened the classroom door, the duo returned to their desks and the rest of the students, Youngjae included, stood up and greeted her at their class president's cue.</p><p>     “Yes, good morning class.” She spoke kindly. The class didn’t instantly notice it, but a student had walked in with her and was now standing next to her podium, nobody could recognize him. “Class, I want you to greet our new student, he’ll be in your homeroom for the remainder of the semester so please treat him kindly.” She whispered something at the student, who stood casually with a bored, expressionless face.</p><p>     “Tuan Mark.” He said oddly, and remained silent afterward.</p><p>     The teacher nodded a bit awkwardly. “Yes, he’s from our exchange program, lets give him a warm welcome, alright?” The class agreed in unison, a bit monotone. Their teacher motioned to the seats so that the new student would sit. The only actual free seat was the one directly connected to Youngjae’s, since he didn’t really socialize nobody bothered to sit next to him.</p><p>     Mark made his way to sit down next to Youngjae, who looked up and pressed his lips together as an attempt to greet him, but the new kid only sat down and ignored the looks of the other students, his deskmate included.</p><p>     <em>'Great, it’ll be like there’s still an empty seat.’</em> Youngjae thought returning his gaze to the teacher who began the class.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>     The bell rang, announcing that lunchtime had begun, students began filing out towards the cafeteria. Youngjae hadn’t been to the cafeteria since his first year, since his mother had begun packing him lunch to avoid feeling like she was neglecting her son. He took it out of his bag and placed it on his desk. There was white rice, vegetables, fried egg rolls, and a roll of kimbap neatly wrapped in aluminum foil.</p><p>     As Youngjae took out his utensils to start eating, his eyes shifted to his deskmate, who was sitting next to him casually, watching a lets play of a game he could recognize. He couldn’t help but stare, thinking of the last time he played that game, and how he missed it. He snapped out of his sudden trance and looked at Mark, apologizing out of habit. But Mark was too busy staring at Youngjaes lunch on the desk, it was only then that he realized Mark had no lunch of his own.</p><p>     “Are you hungry?” Youngjae asked, causing Mark to shift his view towards him. He motioned to the new kid's desk with his head. “You don’t have lunch?”</p><p>     “Oh.” Mark exclaimed softly, moving his phone on the desk so that it would be easier for Youngjae to see the video.</p><p>     Confusion wasn’t even close to what Youngjae was feeling, it was as if his own brain had shut down for a second from trying to process what had just happened. He looked at Mark, who was fully immersed in the gameplay now.</p><p>     Youngjae looked down at his food, still puzzled. <em>‘New guy sure is weird…’</em> he thought to himself. Still, he felt bad, maybe he was too poor to afford lunch and he just played innocent to not worry him. Curiosity getting the best of him, he found himself taking a peek at him, he was a tad skinny so Youngjae thought he must be starving himself.</p><p>     On normal days, Youngjae would have ignored it and continue with his meal, but this was the boy's first day at a new school, so he felt bad for him. After a bit of hesitation, he gently grabbed his kimbap roll and placed it on the desk in front of Mark, who stared at it for a second. He looked at Youngjae, puzzled, but the other had started focusing on his meal. Out of curiosity, he grabbed the foil cylinder, opening one end, and staring at its content.</p><p>     “Sushi?” he asked out loud, catching Youngjaes attention.</p><p>     “No, kimbap.” He said, analyzing the other.</p><p>     “Kimbap.” He repeated, as if reassuring himself. While Mark’s expressionless face had not changed since he sat down, he could feel the other's curiosity as he picked up a roll, looked at its content, and popped it into his mouth. Mark shook his head from side to side, as if uttering a silent ‘<em>not bad,’</em> then they both ate in silence.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>     A couple of days had passed since the new kid had arrived. And while he and Youngjae hadn’t really spoken to each other, they both stayed in the classroom during lunch hour. Mark had begun to bring snacks to lunchtime, usually just things like potato chips and sugary sodas, but it was something. Youngjae still would usually give him something from his lunch, telling him that he should at least try to eat healthy. Mark would never respond, but he always accepted the food.</p><p>     Other than when the teacher asked a question, the only time Youngjae would speak in class was during lunch hour, and even so all he would say was a few words either about food or anything Mark was watching on his phone.</p><p>     Today it just happened to be a shooting game with some very loud man yelling into the microphone during the majority of the video. At one point of the video, the man killed a couple of enemies in a row, and in excitement yelled out a very loud and dramatic “<strong><b>Yeah, eat it!!</b></strong>”.</p><p>     “<strong><b>Yeah! Eat it!!</b></strong>” Youngjae repeated, picking up a piece of chicken with his chopsticks and sticking it in his mouth. To his surprise, the moment he did it Mark let out some sort of happy giggle. From the sudden shock, Youngjae began to choke, coughing loudly, but it was over before Mark could turn to hit him in the back. He kept coughing, feeling as if food was still stuck in his throat.</p><p>     “I’m okay!” he managed to say between coughs. Mark looked at his deskmate blankly, stood up, then hurried out the door.</p><p>     Youngjae managed to calm down from the coughing fit, still confused from Marks sudden outburst. All these days the new kid was almost completely emotionless, it even felt like it was the first time he had actually reacted positively to something Youngjae had said. He felt odd, trying to analyze the situation. Was he getting comfortable around him? Or did he just think it was funny? Was he overthinking the whole thing? Probably.</p><p>     Mark returned quickly to the classroom, standing next to their desks and extending an arm towards Youngjae. It took him a second to analyze, but he finally saw that in the new kid's hand was a bottle of juice, most likely from the vending machine in the hallway. Unconsciously, Youngjae reached out to grab the bottle, already ready to thank his classmate.</p><p>     “Eat.” Mark said, stopping Youngjae in his tracks. He looked up at Mark, who was still standing with his hand extended and the bottle of juice in his hand.</p><p>     “Eat??” he asked a bit too loud, completely flabbergasted.</p><p>     Mark stared down at him, his usually expressionless face looking a bit more awkward than usual. “…Eat…<em>yo</em>?” he said, adding the formal particle.</p><p>     “You’re really starting to scare me…”</p><p>     They both looked at each other for a long second, the new kid looked odd, as if he was trying to figure out what to say. “…<strong><b> I’m sorry, what?</b></strong>” Mark said in perfect English.</p><p>     It was then that it clicked in Youngjaes brain, the reason why Mark was so quiet, why he acted so weird around him, why he ignores people when they talk to him. He didn’t feel himself stand up.</p><p>“You can’t speak Korean!!”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Part 6-13</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Warning: Violence / Homophobia</p><p>Bold = English</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     Youngjae groaned, stretching in his seat as the time for class to start was close. He shut his history book, happy that he was able to finish his homework before class had started. For some reason, Youngjae felt livelier today, even though nothing around him had really changed.</p><p>     “Wait, give me a second!” the class president called out, causing all eyes to turn to the door frame. At the moment Youngjae looked to the door, Mark Tuan entered the room, followed by Jaebum who was trying hard to get his attention. He paused as he noticed everybody was looking at him, then lowered his head, putting his hands in his pockets, and walked towards his row.</p><p>     “Hey, new kid!” Jinyoung passed by Youngjaes seat, walking up to stand in Mark's way, Yugyeom casually following to do the same. “You’re ignoring our class president? You think you’re <em>too cool</em> to answer?”</p><p>     As he spoke he came closer to Mark, eventually, he was inches away from his face, trying to intimidate him. Mark stared him down, clenching his jaw but said nothing.</p><p>     “You think that just because you're from America you’re better than us?” he spits out, grabbing Mark’s shirt, who just pushes his hand away.</p><p>     Mark begins to walk around him to sit down at his desk, but as he approaches, Jinyoung nudges him harshly, causing him to stumble onto his chair and smash his cheek onto Youngjaes shoulder. The latter didn’t even have the chance to react before Mark stands up, eyeing Jinyoung up and down with his hands balled up into fists. Instead of starting anything, he walks off.</p><p>     Youngjae slammed his hands onto his desk, causing everybody to turn him.  “Ya Park Jinyoung!” he exclaimed in pure anger, standing up, his chair flipping back from the force. “You went over the line this time!”</p><p>     There was an audible gasp that went across the room. “He spoke!” Youngjae heard someone say as the classroom erupted into murmurs.</p><p>     Jinyoung stared at him with wide eyes, then laughed in pure shock. “I went over the line?? He’s the one who’s been ignoring everyone since he got here!”</p><p>     “Because he doesn’t speak Korean!! He has no idea what we're saying!” he tried not to scream.</p><p>     “Wow Choi Youngjae,” Jinyoung scoffed, pure anger showing in his face. “Where did all this nerve come from?? Has the foreigner already been a bad influence on you??”</p><p>     The mere mention of the new kid made Youngjae turn to him, standing at the door, staring at him oddly. When he looked back, Im Jaebum was standing behind Jinyoung, a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to stop the situation from escalating. “Stop it you two, or else you’ll get in trouble.”</p><p>     Jinyoung kept staring Youngjae down as he walked by, getting a little bit too close, then sat down at his desk at the back of the classroom.</p><p>     Youngjae picked up his chair and sat back down, pressing his tongue on the inside of his cheek. He knew Park Jinyoung, how he hated to be spoken back to. The door slid open and in came the teacher, a cheerful smile on her face.</p><p>     “Good morning! I hope you all had a good night's rest because today we are going to go through a lot of information. Oh, Mr. Tuan,” Youngjae turned to look at the other door of the classroom, where Mark stood with his bag dangling from his hand oddly. “Please take your seat so I may start the class.” She gestured to his desk. Understanding, he nodded, walking back to sit next to Youngjae without saying a word.</p><p>     Youngjae tapped his foot on the floor, a sudden wave of anxiety going over him, causing him to peek back at Jinyoung. As expected, he had his eyes set on him, smirking as Yugyeom whispered something in his ear. Youngjae turned back and let his head drop. He grasped at the fabric of his pants as if for support, trying hard not to react, but he wasn’t stupid, he knew exactly what he had done.</p><p>     He had given Park Jinyoung a reason.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>     Youngjaes back hit hard against the brick wall of the alleyway, pulling the air out of his lungs. He choked, falling onto the pavement as Jinyoung and Yugyeoms punches had turned into kicks in the stomach. He writhed in pain as the leader kicked him in the chest one last time, causing Youngjae to turn over and gasp for air.</p><p>     “Speak up to me again and I’ll break your pretty little teeth, Choi.” He said spitting on the floor, walking off as he shoved his bruised knuckles into his pockets.</p><p>     Yugyeom loomed over their beat-up classmate as Jinyoung called for him to hurry up. Youngjae looked up to him, hoping to see at least a sign of worry, but instead was greeted with a face of pure disinterest.</p><p>     “This is getting boring.” Yugyeom said, his words felt cold as ice. He turned around and disappeared onto the street.</p><p>     Youngjae laid on his back, staring at the sky as the sun was beginning to set.</p><p>     ‘Just a little longer, so nobody will see.’ He hated that he had to think this way, but he knew it was necessary. If somebody saw, they would call the police, then they would try to prosecute Jinyoung only for his dad to buy off the judge and in the end, it would only bring shame to Youngjaes parents. This was his justification, it's what he always said to himself in situations like this. He clenched his teeth, fighting back tears. His vision became blurry as the sky darkened, it was time to go.</p><p>     Youngjae grabbed his bag, which had been thrown on the hard asphalt, the smooth leather scuffed in different areas. Opening it, he grabbed a mask and put it on to hide his bruised face. He painfully walked through the dark quiet streets of his town and made it to his neighborhood. The lights to his house weren’t on, which meant his parents weren’t home. He took this chance to hurry inside the house, practically running into his room and locking the door behind him, he didn’t even take off his shoes.</p><p>     His room was dark. It seemed so big and empty today for some reason he couldn’t explain. His bookbag dropped on the floor, and he painfully and carefully laid face down on his bed. Youngjae didn’t even bother to take off his uniform, he didn’t care. All he wanted to do was fall asleep and end this nightmare of a day. To think that he felt so good just this morning, it broke his heart. Only now did he allow himself to cry.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>     A broken lip, black eye, and a scratch on his cheek from when he hit the pavement. These were the only visible wounds Youngjae had to worry about. The countless bruises along his torso were hidden well under his school uniform. He put on his glasses, the glare it made hid the small bruise fairly well, he was lucky Jinyoungs punch had been on the softer side, only a night had passed and it looked more yellow than purple.</p><p>     He sat on his bed, waiting as long as he could so that it would seem like he overslept. Youngjae had no intention of going to school like this, he couldn’t wear his mask in class so the teacher would obviously notice his bruised and swollen face and call his parents.</p><p>     The clock showed 7:36, by this time he’d be sleeping in the classroom. Youngjae grabbed his bag and ran out of his room and towards the door. He hurriedly put on his shoes as his mother called out for him.</p><p>     “Youngjae! I thought you had already left!” Mrs. Choi said from the dining table.</p><p>     “I overslept!” Youngjae said fussing with his shoelaces. “I need to run or I won’t make it in time.”</p><p>     “Wait come grab your lunch!” she stood up from her chair.</p><p>     “I’ll just buy something at the cafeteria, I need to go!” -slam!- the door shut behind him and he ran off of their property, he had succeeded.</p><p>     After walking two blocks, Youngjae turned onto a different street than he’s used to, sitting on a random bench. He browsed his phone to pass the time. After about half an hour he stood up, carefully walking back home. His parents' cars were gone, so he ran into his house and into his room.</p><p>Youngjae hung his uniform back up, then laid painfully on his bed. His plan had worked out, and since his parents wouldn’t come back until the night, he knew he had gotten away with it.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>
  
</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p> </p><p>     The classroom was an uproar. The Phoenix was a Twitter account run by a student in their school. He or she posted secrets from the students, they were never wrong so whenever there was a new post, everybody would believe it instantly.</p><p>     “This is so surreal, I never imagined there would be a same-sex couple in our school!” a student said, leaning back on his chair to talk to the girl behind him.</p><p>     “I mean it's not a big deal, it’s a normal thing nowadays, still I’m curious…” she replied, leaning towards her classmate to whisper. “Do you think it could be Donghwan?”</p><p>     “No need for speculation,” chimed in Park Jinyoung, walking along the rows of desks. “We all know who the couple is, heck, half of it didn't come today! Right, Tuan?” he put his hand on Mark's desk, eyeing him down.</p><p>     The new kid ignored him, he didn't even look up from his notebook. Mark had no idea why the classroom was such an uproar, and honestly, he didn’t care. Jinyoung closed Mark's notebook, leaning on it with his hand. Mark looked up at Jinyoung, who met his gaze with a sly grin.</p><p>     “<strong><b>You are gay, right?</b></strong>” Jinyoung spoke in English, in a somewhat mocking tone.</p><p>     Mark leaned back on his chair, confused at the sudden question. “<strong><b>Yeah, so?</b></strong>” as soon as he answered, the classroom erupted with whispers and murmurs. Mark rolled his eyes, smacked his classmate's hand away, and went back to his notes.</p><p>     Jinyoung looked down at him with a satisfied smile. “We got our answer then.” He patted the new kid on the back as he walked to take his seat.</p><p> </p>
<hr/><p> </p><p>     The bell rang, causing students to sigh in relief as they stretched and put down their pens.</p><p>     “Remember the homework I assigned, I’ll be revising in the next class. Oh, is there anybody that can give Mr. Choi the assignment?”</p><p>     “I’m sure Tuan Mark can, Miss.” Jinyoung smiled, eyeing him from his seat. Mark had been stuffing his notebook into his bag, but stopped in his tracks as he heard his name. He looked over at Park, who wiggled his fingers in a mocking wave. Im Jaebum walked over to him, causing Mark's attention to shift to him.</p><p>     The class president smiled, a thin pack of papers in his hands. “<strong><b>Youngjae… give</b></strong>?” he said shyly. Mark tried not to smile, it was nice that he was trying to communicate. Since he had moved to South Korea, the only real person who even attempted to do so nicely was Youngjae. He stared at the papers as he thought this, suddenly worried about the empty chair next to him, and how scared his deskmate had seemed the day before.</p><p>     “Where?”</p><p>...</p><p> </p><p>     Mark stepped out of the bus, turning his head from side to side, overwhelmed since he was somewhere he could not recognize. Night had fallen so the streets were dark, he cursed at himself, thinking of how he should have just skipped his intensive Korean class and come straight here instead. He looked down at the navigation app on his phone, following its directions.</p><p>     Traditional-looking houses adorned the streets, and from the size, Mark knew that Youngjaes family must be well off.</p><p>     <em>“<strong><b>You have reached your destination.</b></strong>”</em> His phone said, causing him to look up from it. The house in front of him was big, with two somewhat fancy looking cars in front. He walked up to the front gate, ringing the intercom with a bit of hesitation.</p><p>     “Who are you?” a male voice rang from the speaker under the camera lens, Mark assumed it was Youngjaes father. He came closer to the camera so that he could be seen properly.</p><p>     “Y-Youngjae… here?” he tried to form the sentence as well as he could, since it hadn’t been long since he started his Korean lessons.</p><p>     There was a long pause, Mark’s heart began to pound anxiously. Was he at the wrong house? His foot tapped on the stone floor. The door buzzed loudly, causing him to jump. He stared at the handle, grabbing it hesitantly and swinging it open.</p><p>     Inside was a nice small courtyard with a small stone path leading up to the house. There was a garden, slightly unkempt, with a fountain in the middle, water tricking rhythmically. The sound calmed Mark's nerves as he made his way to the front door. As soon as he did, it swung open.</p><p>     In the doorframe stood a small woman, Youngjaes mother he assumed, smiling excitedly. “Hello hello! I’m Mrs. Choi, you’re Youngjaes friend from school, yes?”</p><p>     Mark blinked, slightly overwhelmed. All he could do was stare and nod, not knowing exactly what she was saying. All he really understood was “Choi”, “Youngjae” and “school”, so he assumed she knew why he was there.</p><p>     Mrs. Choi smiled warmly, grabbing Mark's hand and pulling it. “Come in come in!”. The inside seemed lavish, with modern-looking furniture, which seemed to contrast with the traditional looking exterior. A man sat at the dinner table, stacks of paper surrounding his laptop. He looked up, eyeing Mark from top to bottom, nodded, then continued tapping away. “Youngjae is in his room.” The woman continued, guiding Mark along the hallway. She knocked on the door.</p><p>     “Just a minute!” a familiar voice called from the other side of the door.</p><p>     “Your friend is here to see you!” she sang out happily.</p><p>     There was a bit of a pause. “M-my friend?”</p><p>     Mrs. Choi turned the doorknob. “Go ahead, he said he isn’t feeling well but I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you!” she patted Mark's lower back, as if encouraging him to walk in, and so he did. The door closed behind him.</p><p>     The room seemed dark. Schoolbooks were stacked on the desk and shelves, some even opened and spread on the bed. There were what seemed to be bits of shredded paper taped on the wall oddly, as if they had been ripped off of the walls. Only one thing wasn’t shredded, a poster of what seemed to be a piano recital, dated a couple of years back.</p><p>     “Oh, Mark-ssi, it's you.” Mark's head turned away from the walls as he finally noticed Youngjae, sitting on his bed, under the sheets with dozens of papers around him, and a mask covering half of his face. “<strong><b>Why you here</b></strong>?” he said, observing as his classmate stood there awkwardly.</p><p>     Something was wrong, Mark had no idea why, but he could feel it. “<strong><b>Why didn’t you come to school</b></strong>?”</p><p>     He saw Youngjae grab onto his sheet with one hand. “Oh,<strong><b> I am sick</b></strong>?” he laughed awkwardly, casually pulling a strand of hair behind his ear by habit. The lighting was dim, but still, Mark could make out a faint red line on Youngjaes jaw, in a spot where the mask wasn’t covering. His bag thumped on the floor, and he rushed over to him.</p><p>     “W-what are you—”</p><p>    Mark pulled down Youngjaes mask, revealing the bottom of his bruised face. Only then did he see the bruise under his eye camouflaged by the glare of his glasses. He sat on the edge of the bed, eyeing Youngjaes face. “<strong><b>What happened</b></strong>??”</p><p>     Youngjae shushed him, pointing at the door, as if telling Mark that his parents can’t find out. “<strong><b>I’m okay</b></strong>.” He whispered a bit awkwardly.</p><p>     Mark could only stare at him. His lip was broken, and he had long scratches from his  cheek to his jaw. “<strong><b>Did Park do this</b></strong>?” he said softly. Youngjaes eyes widened at the mention of his name, which answered his question. Anger grew in the pit of Mark's stomach.<strong><b> “You’re not sick. This is why you didn’t come… you need to tell the teacher.</b></strong>”</p><p>     Youngjae looked up, panic showing clear as day on his face. “No!...<strong><b>N-no tell.</b></strong>”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Are you just gonna let him get away with this?</b></strong>” Mark eyed him, flabbergasted.</p><p>     Youngjae groaned, scratching his head in anguish. “I don’t understand you!”</p><p>     “<strong><b>What??</b></strong>” Mark said, then grunted in frustration. “<strong><b>I hate not being able to speak Korean!</b></strong>”</p><p>     There was a knock on the door. Mark stood up in surprise and Youngjae hurriedly put his mask back on. The door swung open and Mrs. Choi's head popped in. “Is everything alright, boys? I heard yelling.”</p><p>     Youngjae chuckled falsely, it almost seemed like he was used to it, Mark thought. “It’s okay mom, Mark only speaks English so we can’t communicate very well.”</p><p>     His mom turned to his classmate, her eyes seemed to glisten in excitement. “Oh! <strong><b>American?</b></strong> Aigoo no wonder he barely said anything earlier! <strong><b>Nice to meet you, welcome to Korea!</b></strong>”</p><p>     “Mom you don't need to do that…”</p><p>     “Well he’s your friend, shouldn’t I be nice to him?” she smiled, without taking her eyes off of Mark.</p><p>     “W-we're not exactly friends… he just came over cause he didn’t understand the assignment.” He lied, scratching the back of his head.</p><p>     “Aaah, so he’s having trouble in class. <strong><b>No Korean</b></strong>?” she tilted her head, Mark nodded shyly in response. “Youngjae why don't you teach him then?”</p><p>     “Teach…?” Mark repeated, recognizing the word. “<strong><b>Teach? I take class after school, it's okay.</b></strong>”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Eh tutor tutor!</b></strong>” she smiled widely. “You can help him practice Youngjae!”</p><p>     Youngjae sighed, he knew that once her mom had her mind set on something she wouldn’t take no for an answer. “<strong><b>I can help, yes?</b></strong>”</p><p>     Mark looked over at his deskmate, who had his head down. Something felt odd to him. Was it that Youngjae was lying to his parents? Was it that he was just forced to consider tutoring him? Or was it the fact that since she came in the room, Mrs. Choi had not looked at her son even once?</p><p>     “Okay.” he heard himself say.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Part 14- 21</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Warning: Homophobia</p><p>Bold = English</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     Mark walked into the classroom, his bag dangling casually from his shoulder. As soon as he did, all eyes turned to greet him. He froze, scanning the classroom as they began to whisper amongst themselves. A small sigh barely escaped his lips. <strong><em><b>'Great. Only a week and I’m already an outcast.</b></em></strong>’ He thought turning away from their glares and walking towards his seat.</p><p>     His deskmate's head popped up from his textbook as soon as Mark appeared in front of him. Half of Youngjaes face was covered with a mask, but Mark could still see a soft smile form on his face.</p><p>     “<strong><b>Good morning</b></strong>…” Youngjae almost whispered as his classmate sat down beside him.</p><p>     “<strong><b>Morning</b></strong>.” He said turning his head to look back at Park Jinyoung, who stared at them with a sly look on his face. “<strong><b>Has he said anything</b></strong>?” Mark placed his book on his seat, looking back to the front.</p><p>     “<strong><b>N-no</b></strong>…” Youngjaes head fell slightly. Mark turned to him slightly, observing him. The small bruise under his eye could be easily mistaken as dark circles from lack of sleep. He sighed, all he could do was blame himself.</p><p>     After Youngjae's outburst against Park Jinyoung, Mark had become uneasy. When his deskmate turned to look at him, standing near the door, he could tell something was wrong, he could see fear in his eyes. Knowing what had happened, Mark only grew angrier. He should have walked Youngjae home, even if Jinyoung and his lackey tried to do something, he could have at least fought back. It was his fault, and the fact that he hadn’t really cared hurt him. Youngjae had been the first person to show him any real kindness since he transferred, it devastated him that he could have done something about it.</p><p>     “<strong><b>I should have been there</b></strong>…” Mark murmured.</p><p>     “What was that?” he asked, scribbling in his notebook something Mark was unable to read.</p><p>     “Mr. Choi?” the teacher's voice called out from the front of the room. “You know how I feel about masks in my classroom.”</p><p>     Youngjae seemed to hesitate, but pulled on the straps of his mask, taking it off slowly. The scratches on his face were covered by a large bandage, and as they noticed it, their classmates began to murmur between themselves.</p><p>     “Youngjae! What happened to you?” He heard Park Jinyoung yell from his seat, the fakeness of his voice causing a knot to form in his throat. Mark clenched his fist under the desk.</p><p>     “A-ah. I fell off my bicycle…” Youngjae lied. Every time he made up an excuse, Mark became more uneasy. How many times did this boy need to make stuff up for him to be so used to lying so calmly? He looked at him in the corner of his eye. From the way he was smiling, if Mark hadn’t known the truth, he would have believed him too.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     The plan was simple: before class, during lunch, and after Mark's intensive Korean class, Youngjae would be tutoring him. In return, Mark would help him with his English.</p><p>     “Hello, it’s nice to meet you.” Youngjae said, pronouncing every syllable slowly.</p><p>     “Hello. It’s nice to <em>mee</em> you.” Mark repeated even slower, tracing his fingers along the sentence written in his notebook.</p><p>     “Meet.” Youngjae corrected him, emphasizing the pronunciation. Mark nodded, saying it correctly this time. Youngjae smiled softly, writing down another sentence for his new student to read.</p><p>     The door to the classroom opened, and in came none other than Park Jinyoung. The moment he laid eyes on his two targets, a sly grin formed on his face. He looked back as Yugyeom approached him, signaling with his finger so he would pay attention to what was about to happen.</p><p>     “Wow! It’s actually true! Congratulations Youngjae!” Jinyoung boomed from the other side of the room.</p><p>     The duo looked up from their notebooks. Youngjae stared at him, not sure if confused or already annoyed, wondering what his classmate had planned. “What are you talking about?”</p><p>     Jinyoung snickered “About you and Tuan being a couple, of course!”</p><p>     “Couple?” Mark repeated in a confused tone.</p><p>     “I don’t get it.” Youngjae observed Park as he elbowed his lackey, who scratched his nose to hide his grin.</p><p>    “I hope you guys are very happy sinning together~” they pranced away dramatically, arms linked. The classroom was empty once more.</p><p>     Youngjae felt his shoulders drop, he hadn’t even noticed how tense he was until the duo left, like he was in a defensive position. He was used to Jinyoungs casual teasing, but ever since he stood up to him it had gotten worse, any chance he got to belittle him, he’d take it.</p><p>     Mark broke the silence “<strong><b>What does </b></strong>‘couple’<strong><b> mean?</b></strong>”</p><p>     Youngjaes head shot up, slightly flustered at the sudden question. “<strong><b>You and me, together?</b></strong>”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Together? Ah, so that’s what he was talking about yesterday…</b></strong>” Mark leaned back on his chair, with an annoyed expression on his face.“<strong><b>I'm getting tired of Jinyoung Park…</b></strong>”</p><p>     “That punk.”</p><p>     “That punk?” Mark repeated.</p><p>     "<b>Insult insult!</b>”</p><p>     Mark nodded “That punk!” he said dramatically, making Youngjae crack up. Once again, in the back of Mark's mind was the thought that this was all his fault. If he had understood Jinyoung the day before, he wouldn’t have had a reason to pick on Youngjae today. He poked the inside of his cheek with his tongue, trying to keep those thoughts away. For now, all he could do was try to keep Youngjae distracted, hopefully then it won’t affect him as much. And at the same time, Mark would keep an eye on Jinyoung Park.</p><p><em>     'That punk.’</em> He thought, still not really understanding what it actually meant.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     Youngjae leaned back on his desk chair, taking a break from his calculus homework and looking out to the street. It was already dark out, he hadn’t even noticed the sun setting.</p><p>     ‘<em>It’s about that time…’</em> he thought, keeping his eyes peeled. As if on cue, a head of bouncy blonde hair came into the view of the orange streetlights, and it was as if someone had jumpstarted Youngjae. He scrambled to fix his bed, still messy from this morning.</p><p>     He heard the doorbell ring. Youngjae moved the papers on his desk, trying to make it seem less cluttered but still looking as if he’s working hard.</p><p>     “<strong><b>Helloooo! So nice to see you again! Come in!</b></strong>” He heard his mom say. Now came the difficult part, how would Youngjae sit? Elbows on his desk? No, too nerdy. Sitting straight with his hands on his lap? Did he want to look like a sociopath??</p><p>    Only then did he actually think, what the heck was he doing?? Trying to impress the new foreign exchange student? It's too late for that now, Park Jinyoung had made it his goal to make him look as pathetic as possible.</p><p>     Youngjae shook his head, pushing away those thoughts. This isn’t about him, this is about helping his new classmate adapt to his new life in a different country. There was a knock on his door. Youngjae panicked again, fumbling around in his chair before mumbling what he thought was a cool way of saying “come in” without actually saying anything.</p><p>     Mark twisted the doorknob, entering his classmate's room. He found him sitting at his desk, one leg folded so that he could rest his elbow on his knee, and he held a pencil to his mouth.</p><p>     “<strong><b>Yo.</b></strong>” Mark greeted him casually, trying not to laugh at how dorky he looked.</p><p>     “<strong><b>Yo~ Mark!</b></strong>” Youngjae joked around, making the other laugh.</p><p>     Mark threw his bag onto Youngjae's bed, sprawling onto it as if it was his own. “Tired!” he said, sighing deeply.</p><p>     “<strong><b>Don’t sleep!</b></strong>” Youngjae smacked his head with a rolled-up English booklet, sitting cross-legged on his bed. “<strong><b>So, what learned today?</b></strong>”</p><p>     “<strong><b>What did you learn today.</b></strong>” Mark corrected him, Youngjae repeated. “Names. My name is Tuan Mark. My school’s name is Hanlim High. My parent's names are Raymond and Dorine. My friend’s name is Choi Young-Jae.”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Oooh I’m friend?</b></strong>” Youngjae laughed.</p><p>     “<strong><b>I mean we’ve been hanging out almost every day since we met, I’d consider us friends.</b></strong>” Mark scratched the back of his head, slightly flustered for no real reason.</p><p>     Youngjae smiled softly. “<strong><b>I’m very honored.</b></strong>” He shifted his weight around, changing the subject back to Mark's lesson.“<strong><b>Very good, very good. More?</b></strong>”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     It had been a couple of weeks with the same routine. Youngjae would wake up, run to school to meet up with Mark so they could study, go to class, get harassed by Park Jinyoung, go home while Mark would be in his intensive Korean lessons and then wait for him to come over to study some more. It was tiring, but obviously paying off. Mark was now able to speak in a very casual and minimalistic manner, which meant he could answer the teacher and understand when people spoke to him slowly. Youngjae had also improved on his English, more in the written sense than spoken, but it’s helped him on tests and homework.</p><p>     But as they spent more and more time together, Park Jinyoung became more and more ruthless with his insults, making Marks skin boil every time he spoke.</p><p>     “I’m going to kill him.” Mark growled as Jinyoungs back disappeared through the classroom door and towards the cafeteria.</p><p>     Youngjae lowered his head, scribbling little circles on the edges of his notebook. “You know…” he paused, hesitating for a second. “He wasn’t always like this. We used to be friends when we were kids.”</p><p>     Mark turned his head, briskly leaning on his desk to look at Youngjae seriously. “Friends?? But… he hit you?”</p><p>     Youngjae nodded, unconsciously biting his lip right where it had been broken, the mark still noticeable. “We were best friends actually, ever since we were kids. Then when we entered high school, he started being mean. Calling me ugly, stupid, pushing me… I never knew what I did wrong.”</p><p>     Mark thought for a bit, but didn’t say anything. Whether he didn’t understand anything or he was thinking deeply about something, Youngjae didn’t pry, and they both let the conversation drop.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>...</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>     Youngjae washed his hands, drying them with the cheap paper napkins the school bathroom provided. It wouldn’t be long until lunch break was over, so he had to hurry back to the classroom. He tried not to run down the hallway, and made it through his classroom doors just in time to see Park Jinyoung pulling Mark by the collar of his shirt</p><p>     “Take it back!!” he was furious. Mark didn’t budge, staring coldly at Jinyoung. Youngjae saw his fist ball up, and he knew what was about to happen. “You son of a—”</p><p>     “Stop it!” Im Jaebum grabbed Jinyoungs wrist just as he was reeling it back. “You’re gonna get in trouble.”</p><p>     “Get off of me, fairy!” He pulled his arm away, making Jaebum flinch. He let go of Mark's collar, grabbed his book bag, and made his way to the door. Youngjae stood at the frame, completely frozen, as Jinyoung passed by, smacking his shoulder onto his forcefully.</p><p>     No matter how many times he asked, Mark never told him what he had said to Jinyoung.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     Half a week had gone by since the incident in the classroom. Park Jinyoung had not come to school since, causing a number of rumors to be formed between the other classmates. Some claimed he had switched schools, saying Mark had threatened him. The most famous theory though was that his parents had sent him off on vacation, since it wouldn’t be the first time it had happened.</p><p>     Youngjae had no idea what to think of the situation. Anytime he tried to bring up what had happened, Mark would stay quiet with a face cold as stone.</p><p>     Lost in thought, Youngjae barely notices the tall looming figure standing in front of their desks. He looks up to meet the eyes of no other than Kim Yugyeom. His face was serious, but his eyes, Youngjae swore he could see a hint of something else, something he couldn’t recognize.</p><p>     “Bathroom, now.” He said flatly, turning around and walking off before the duo even had a chance to react.</p><p>     They looked at each other, silently agreeing, and heading off to the men’s bathroom.</p><p>     They didn’t know what they expected to find, but neither of them expected to enter the bathroom to find no other than their class president nervously biting his nails.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Part 22 - 29</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Warning: Homophobia / kidnapping</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     Youngjae took a sip from the water fountain right before class was supposed to start. The hallways were packed, students loitering before they had to go into their respective rooms.</p><p>     “I forget how big this school is.” Youngjae wiped his chin, moving aside so Mark could have his turn.</p><p>     “Noisy.” Mark grumbled.</p><p>     And just as he said it, the crowd quieted down, gaining the attention of the duo. All eyes were focused at the school's entrance, as no other than Park Jinyoung entered. He stopped, paralyzed as he noticed the stares of the school's alumni. He pulled on the strap of his backpack, walking down the hall as various students tried to come up to him. They showered him with words of support and understanding, but he just brushed them off, his face emotionless.</p><p>     The duo observed Jinyoung as he walked by. Youngjaes gaze fell to his feet, as he gave a little melancholic smile.</p><p>     “He really hasn't changed.” He walked off.</p><p>     Mark watched as Youngjae entered the classroom. He couldn’t help but feel a bit confused. After all the things Jinyoung did to him, Youngjae still worried about him. He felt bad once more, since this also was his fault, but he knew it was necessary, not just for Youngjae, but for Jinyoung too. Mark just hoped that he did the right thing for once.</p><p>     He made it through the back door of the classroom. The other students would sneak looks at Park, whispering amongst themselves in pitying tones. But Jinyoung, sitting hunched over his desk, was burning a hole into the back of Youngjaes head.</p><p> </p><p>...</p><p> </p><p>     The bell rang and the teacher dismissed the students. Mark stretched in his chair, smiling calmly as another school week had come to an end. Only his silent celebration was cut short as he saw his desk mates head hung in despair.</p><p>     “You okay, Youngjae?” Mark lowered his head to look up at his friend, who shook his head as an answer.</p><p>     “I’m dead” Youngjae grumbled, rubbing his hands on his face in frustration.</p><p>     Mark observed his face, a bit worried. And suddenly, like a lightbulb turning on in his head, he knew. A smile crept up on his face.</p><p>     “It’s about the English Literature test, isn’t it?” Youngjaes head banged against his desk. Mark laughed, he had gotten his answer. “You have the whole weekend to study, I’m sure you’ll do well.” He patted Youngjaes back.</p><p>     “You have nothing to worry about! You’re good at English and your Korean is improving like crazy. If I fail this test I won’t be able to get into university…”</p><p>     Mark stayed quiet, so long that Youngjae considered the fact that maybe he didn’t understand him. “Well, wanna stay over at my house and study then?”</p><p>     Youngjaes head shot up. “W-wait for real???” he grabbed Mark's shoulders in excitement. “That would be amazing Mark!”</p><p>     Mark couldn’t help but laugh, this is the most excited he had ever seen Youngjae. In a way, he was glad he could make him this happy.</p><p>     “Okay, we need to stop by my house, though.” Youngjae said. His arms shot up in the air. “Woo! I’m not gonna fail!” he exclaimed grabbing his stuff.</p><p>     “You don’t know that.” Mark teased, getting up from his seat. Only then did he realized Park Jinyoung, still sitting on his desk, looking at both of them. Marks face fell, which made Jinyoung smirk. He grabbed his bag and walked out of the classroom, an odd aura around him.</p><p>     Youngjae was right, he really had not changed.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     Youngjaes mom was thrilled to hear her son would be staying over at his friend's house. She nearly screamed through the phone when Youngjae called her, just out of respect since he knew they wouldn’t really care if he did or not.</p><p>     Mark had just gotten out of his intensive Korean class and decided to come pick Youngjae up. Youngjae had no idea he was gonna come over, so Mark had to wait for him. He sat on the living room couch, waiting for Youngjae to finish packing up some extra clothes and stuff. He looked around the room out of boredom. On the walls there were different pictures of Youngjae as a child, he seemed like a happy kid, Mark thought. Oddly, he realized there were no recent pictures of him, the latest being one that Youngjae looked around ten years old.</p><p>     “Okay I’m done.” Youngjae stepped down the stairs, his book bag hanging on one shoulder and a small duffel bag on the other.</p><p>     “Lets go.” Mark said, standing up. In the corner of his eye, he noticed a large object covered with a white sheet. “What’s that?”</p><p>     Youngjae stared at it, his face slightly falling. “Oh, it’s a piano.”</p><p>     Mark pursed his lips in curiosity. “You play?”</p><p>     Youngjae paused, turning around to flip the light off. “No, not really.”</p><p> </p><p>...</p><p> </p><p>     The sun was already setting as they got off the bus. The air seemed a little tense since the moment in Youngjae’s living room, but Mark didn’t really understand why.</p><p>     Youngjae was the one to break the silence. “By the way, are your parents okay with me staying over?”</p><p>     “My parents are in Cancun.” Mark said casually.</p><p>     Youngjae tried not to stop in his tracks. “W-wait? So there’s no-one in your house??”</p><p>     “Why, are you nervous?” Mark smirked, leaning onto his friend suspiciously</p><p>     “Nervous?” Youngjae repeated, more than a little bit flustered.</p><p>     “I learned that word today.” He changed the subject, giggling slightly at what he thought was a good prank. Youngjae held onto his backpack, pushing Mark with his shoulder in revenge. That only made Mark laugh more.</p><p>     But the laughing was cut short as two men covered the classmates' heads with bags, pulling them both onto a van. They barely had time to react before the doors shut and the vehicle began moving.</p><p>     “<strong><b>W-what the fuck??</b></strong>” Mark yelled out, trying to pull himself away from the man holding his arms back. Youngjae was paralyzed, full of fear.</p><p>     “Which one of you was it??” a familiar voice yelled out, grabbing Youngjae by the shirt.</p><p>     “W-wait, Park Jinyoung??” Mark recognized the voice.</p><p>     “Which one of you told the Phoenix??” he switched to hold onto Mark instead.</p><p>     “What are you—” Jinyoung had thin patience. He did a motion with his hands and with a quick blow to the head, Mark and Youngjae were both out cold.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     “Mark!” Youngjaes voice seemed distant as Mark's eyes slowly opened, getting accustomed to the light. “Mark, wake up!” this time he felt as the other shook him vigorously, and he turned to see the panicked face of his friend.</p><p>     “<strong><b>What the…</b></strong>” Mark said hoarsely, slowly sitting up, everything still blurry.</p><p>     “Thank goodness you’re awake! Is your head okay?” Youngjae touched the back of Mark's head, finding a swollen bump, but no blood so he breathed of relief.</p><p>     “Where are we?”</p><p>     “We're in a storage room in Jinyoungs family villa, we used to play here when we were kids.”</p><p>     Mark was finally able to look around. There we’re shelves filled with canned foods and random objects cluttered around the room. Right next to them were the bags they had been carrying.</p><p>“<strong><b>This bastard actually kidnapped us…</b></strong>” he said grabbing his book bag and looking through it for his phone, but it was nowhere to be seen. He groaned, throwing the whole thing away in frustration.</p><p>     “Jinyoung he… he said something about the Phoenix…” Youngjae murmured, trying to make sense of the whole situation.</p><p>     “What’s the Phoenix?”</p><p>     “It's an account on Twitter, made by somebody in the school, it spreads rumors of the students, which usually end up being true…”</p><p>     Mark rolled his eyes. “<strong><b>What is this gossip girl shit…</b></strong>”</p><p>     “The other day it posted about what happened to Jinyoung. About the place he was sent to.”</p><p>     “What? That’s impossible, only a few of us knew about that!”</p><p>     “I’m guessing that’s why we're here… he thinks one of us told the Phoenix…”</p><p>     Mark laid back down, frustrated. In a way, he understood why Jinyoung did it. After his parents sent him to such a horrible place, they must have been furious to know he had communicated with the class president and told him. Not to mention now the whole school knew what they had done, that must have been the reason they brought him back.</p><p>     “Jinyoungs dad… he’s terrifying.” Youngjae said, mostly to himself. “I met him once, and he looked at me with such disgust… My parents told me that he had bought off the judges years ago after he was charged for something horrible, so I know he’s a monster. And Jinyoung had to live with him…”</p><p>     And just like that, they forgot what had just happened, sympathizing with poor Jinyoung. They knew it was stupid, that Jinyoung was fucked up to do something like this, but with the fear that was fueling him after growing up in such a horrible environment, they couldn’t help but understand.</p><p>     They were fine. Sure they were locked up in a storage room, but other than a bump in the head, they were perfectly okay. Youngjaes parents weren’t expecting him home until tomorrow, and Mark’s wouldn’t be back until next week, so nobody would know they were missing. In this situation, they had nothing to do but what they were planning to do in the first place, sit down and study.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     A couple of hours had passed while Mark helped Youngjae wrap his head around the story they were reading for English Lit, which would be the main focus for their test on Monday. Mark stretched out his back, deciding it was about time they both take a break.</p><p>     And just like every time they stopped for more than a minute, their minds went back to the whole situation.</p><p>     “Y’know, what happened tonight,” Mark broke the silence “Well, what’s still happening… what you said about Jinyoung and his family, it pretty much confirms my <strong><b>theory</b></strong>.”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Theory</b></strong>?”</p><p>     Mark laid on the floor, hands behind his head. “I tried talking to him about it the other day, he almost punched me in the face…”</p><p>     Youngjae quietly stared at Mark, not exactly sure if he wanted him to continue or not.</p><p>     “Park Jinyoung, he fell in love with you.” Mark said softly, pressing his lips together. “Back before you entered high school.”</p><p>     A million thoughts went through Youngjae’s head. He didn’t know how to react, if he should be shocked or in disbelief. He shook his head. “He wouldn’t have done what he did, if that were true…”</p><p>     “Yes, he would have.”</p><p>     “Shut up.” Youngjae said under his breath. “You don’t know him. My Jinyoungie wouldn’t do that.”</p><p>     Mark stared at his friend, who was visibly shaking, grabbing onto the fabric of his pants. “After all he did, you still see him as your old friend?”</p><p>     “He would have told me. H-he—”</p><p>     “He was scared Youngjae. Scared to admit that he was everything his father hated, scared of him finding out, scared of what he’d do to yo—”</p><p>     “Shut up!” Youngjae yelled, standing up. He dug his fingernails into his scalp. “You… You coward…”</p><p>     Mark stared at him, he’d never seen Youngjae like this. “Young—”</p><p>     “Jinyoungie you coward!!” he yelled into the air, knocking over a metal shelf as he forced his way to the door, pounding on it with his fists. “All this time you made me think you hated me! You made everyday living hell and you never told me why! I kept asking myself how horrible was I that you hated me so much, what did I do to earn all of this…”</p><p>     Mark made his way to Youngjae, wrapping his arms around him so that his arms would be pinned onto his body and he would stop hitting the door. He pulled him back. “Youngjae sto—"</p><p>     “I would have been there for you!” he screamed, his body loosening up. Only now did Mark noticed the tears streaming down his friend's face. “You didn’t have to go through this alone...” his knees buckled, and Mark fell down along him to their knees.</p><p>“You coward…” Youngjae whimpered.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     Mark opened his eyes to find himself still in the storage room. Directly in front of him laid Youngjae, fast asleep. It had taken him a long time to calm down, but as soon as he did all he wanted to do was lay down and sleep.</p><p>     He couldn’t help but stare at him, sleeping so calmly even in this situation. Youngjae's cheek was squishing onto his arm as he laid with his head resting on it. The mark from where his lip had broken was still visible, as if a constant reminder to Mark about what had happened to him. His bangs were wet with sweat, sticking oddly to his forehead and covering his eyes.</p><p>Mark, still half asleep, found himself reaching out to pull the hair out of Youngjaes eyes, but ended up just putting his hand on his cheek. It was warm and soft, so Mark just let it lay there, still too sleepy to really understand.</p><p>     It felt like an eternity passed by like this as Mark regained his consciousness. He didn’t know why, but even when he realized what he was doing, he couldn’t find it in him to remove his hand. That is, until he heard a loud clanking sound from outside.</p><p>     Mark sat up, looking at the door as the noises came closer. He shook Youngjae harshly, and he woke up looking around with a shocked expression.</p><p>     “I think someone’s coming in.” Mark whispered, staring at the door while holding onto Youngjaes arms.</p><p>     “What do we do?” Youngjae was now fully awake from the shock.</p><p>     The door swung open, and the cold night air whooshed into the room, giving the duo a chill. The room was dead quiet, as they both observed none other than Park Jinyoung, entering slowly and quietly. He just stood there, staring at the duo.</p><p>     Mark clenched his fist, ready for whatever Park was about to do. But before anything, he felt Youngjaes hand bump onto his chest, as if telling him to stop. Only then did he really look at their captor, and was surprised that there wasn’t even the trace of a smirk or grin on his face. He didn’t look at all like the Jinyoung Mark had come to know.</p><p>     He looked broken.</p><p>    Jinyoungs eyes were fixed on Youngjae. Mark looks up at his friend, who is staring back at their captor.</p><p>     ‘<strong><em><b>He can tell too…</b></em></strong><em>’</em>Mark notices Youngjaes eyes begin to shine with what he imagined were the tears that were about to fall.</p><p>     Youngjae smiles as the first ones start streaming down his face. And right then, as if they both had been triggered, Youngjae stood up at the same moment Jinyoung threw himself forward, clinging onto his old friend. He sobbed into Youngjaes neck, holding onto him as if he felt like he would float away.</p><p>     Mark could only stare at them. In a moment like this, they truly forgot where they were and what had happened. And just like that, Mark knew it was over. He couldn’t help but smile.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     It was around 2am. Mark had called a taxi to take him home. Jinyoung tried to insist to pay for it but Mark had to refuse, something about your kidnapper ordering you a taxi home surprisingly didn’t sit right with him. Youngjae had decided to stay over with Jinyoung. They both had a lot to talk about tonight so Mark had no choice but to let him.</p><p>     He opened the front door to his home, dropping his keys in the bowl and almost forgetting to take his shoes off. He went up to his room, throwing his backpack onto his bed and himself next to it.</p><p>     You’d think that after the night he’s had, he’d fall asleep instantly. But that wasn’t the case, instead, he spent a good while just staring at the ceiling, his mind blank. He rubbed his face, frustrated and tired. He decided to do what always made him sleepy on nights like this: study!</p><p>     Mark sat at his desk, taking out his Korean literature book and his notebooks. After finding his place, he started scribbling away, slowly copying the sentences from his book on his notebook, to practice at the same time. Even so, his mind couldn’t help but wander back to tonight’s events. All he could think of was the storage room, hot and stuffy, and of Youngjae. He saw his friend, laying on the floor asleep as Mark had his hand on his face. He saw his glassy eyes as he looked at his old friend. And for a moment, Mark swore he could smell Youngjaes sweet scent as he hugged him goodbye. And just like that, Mark completely understood.</p><p>     Mark laid back on his chair, letting his head fall completely back so he was precariously dangling it from the back. He shut his eyes tightly, and couldn't contain a soft laugh.</p><p>“<strong><b>I guess you should have seen this coming, Mark.</b></strong>”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Part 30 - 37</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     Mark was surprised to see that his deskmate wasn’t in the classroom when he arrived. He’d been so used to arriving and seeing him sitting at his desk, half asleep and invested in his textbook. Once he’d approach, Youngjae would look up at him, giving him a soft “good morning” with a warm, sleepy smile. He sat at his desk awkwardly, taking out his notes automatically.</p><p>     The weekend had passed, and he hadn’t heard from Youngjae since he left him at Jinyoung’s house early Saturday morning. He couldn’t quite identify the reason, but Mark felt uneasy. How he could just leave Youngjae there, after all that had happened. He didn’t know if he was worried, or if it was something else… but overall it just frustrated him, to the point where all he could do was stare at his notes. His brain was crammed with too many thoughts of what happened in the weekend, so much that the Korean letters scribbled on the pages just looked like gibberish to him. He scratched his head vigorously, letting out a frustrated grunt, and decided to go out for some air. He got up from his chair, then noticed no other than Kim Yugyeom, standing at the doorframe, looking straight at him. Something about the way he was looking at him made Mark feel odd, and strange enough, it made him feel like somehow Yugyeom was identifying with him. At moments like this he would usually smirk at Mark or insult him, but instead, Yugyeom just stretched his neck and looked at the floor before just turning around and leaving the classroom.</p><p>     Somehow that exchange just made Mark feel worse. ‘<strong><em><b>Everything is wrong.</b></em></strong>’ He thought, rushing out of the classroom. It was as if everything had changed, the bad guys weren’t being bad, and his friend who couldn’t go half an hour without sending him a text or even a stupid meme had gone completely AWOL.  </p><p>     He walked down the hallways, his shoes clacking on the cool floors. Students were chatting, but Mark couldn’t hear anything. He didn’t have a plan; would he go to Youngjae’s house? Jinyoung’s? He had to do <em>something</em>! In his mind a million thoughts were just rushing by, getting louder and faster as he got closer to the front door, and then instantly stopping.</p><p>     The first thing he saw was his bouncy, slightly messy chestnut-colored hair, and he instantly recognized him. Youngjae casually walked through the front door, a relaxed, calm smile on his lips. Mark stopped in his tracks, as if frozen on the spot. His friend looked back out the door, beckoning slightly. As he did, Park Jinyoung stepped into the doorway. Youngjae smiled at him, and Mark's heart couldn’t help but sink.</p><p>     It was only then that he could hear the whispers. Jinyoung’s name went from mouth to mouth, and somewhere in the murmurs, he could hear Youngjae’s name as well. But it wasn’t until he heard his own name, that’s when it clicked in his mind. What this looked like, him rushing through the halls and stopping at the sight of them, and suddenly he could hear the pity in their voice when they said his name.</p><p>     But it didn’t matter, people will always talk. Right now, all that mattered was that his friend was okay. Although, that didn’t mean Mark had calmed down. He came to his senses, and kept walking towards them, still unsure of what he was going to do when he reached them. A million more thoughts passed through his mind, and only then did he realize Jinyoung had left Youngjae’s side and was walking towards him. His eyes met Mark's, and he gave him a little sly smirk, walking with his usual bad-boy swagger. But to Mark's surprise, Jinyoung just walked past him. He turned to look at him, as did the rest of the students, only to see his arms wrap around none other than Im Jaebums waist.</p><p>     Jaebum looked up at him, slightly frozen. He looked around at the audience looking straight at them. “Right here?” he mouthed quietly. Jinyoung smiled, and as an answer, he pressed his lips gently onto his.</p><p>     And instantly, the fog clouding Mark just disappeared, and he felt like he could breathe again. Youngjae bumped his hip onto Marks playfully, popping him out of his bubble. He looked up at his friend, who smiled cheerfully.</p><p>     “So, it was them all along.” Mark said unconsciously, as if his brain was forcing him to speak. “You must have had a lot to talk about, huh?”</p><p>     Youngjae raised an eyebrow. “Why do you ask? <strong><b>Were you </b></strong><strong><em><b>nervous</b></em></strong>?” he said coyly, laughing a second after.</p><p>     For a moment, Mark considered answering.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     And just like that, things were back to normal. Well, sort of. Every day, Mark would arrive at school to find Youngjae at his usual spot. He’d greet him as he always did, half asleep and happy. Only now, instead of the constant insults and jabs, Park Jinyoung would come over to their desk with a happy “good morning!” before chatting away with Youngjae about random things.</p><p>     Something about Youngjae had changed too. From the way he spoke to just how he acted. He seemed calmer, but then again if the person who had made your life living hell had stopped attacking you daily, you’d feel calmer too. Mark was glad, but something deep inside him still didn’t trust Jinyoung. Then again, he had no choice but to accept their friendship, since Youngjae overall seemed happier.</p><p>     After school, the duo was walking together to the bus stop. Mark had to go to his intensive Korean classes less and less, so now he had more free time on his hands.</p><p>     “We should go somewhere.” Mark said looking up to the sky, as if deep in thought.</p><p>     “Hm? Like where?” Youngjae tilted his head casually.</p><p>     Mark shrugged. “<strong><b>I dunno</b></strong>. Somewhere chill. After all those tests, I need to unwind, let go of all this <strong><b>stress</b></strong>.”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Stress</b></strong>?” Youngjae repeated. “Hmm… I think I know a place…”</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>...</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>     It was Mark's first time at a PC Café, he didn’t even know a place like this existed. Rows and rows of desks with large computers, everyday people scattered around playing games and unwinding after school or work, it seemed like heaven to him.</p><p>     They sat at the back, where they were the only people in their row. Before they knew it, they were invested in their 1v1 game, unleashing the competitive side in both of them.</p><p>     Youngjae’s fingers tapped the keys quickly as they could. He let out a small frustrated grunt as his character's health lowered and lowered, until the screen read “DEFEAT” in bold red letters. He leaned back in his chair, franticly scratching his head in anguish.</p><p>     “You’re really bad at this.” Mark laughed, taking a sip of his soda. “Hmm…. I think I might be in the mood for some chips, how about it, slave?” he smirked evilly.</p><p>     Youngjae sighed as he got up. Before they started, the duo had made a bet that for every win, the loser had to do whatever the winner wanted. If Youngjae had known how competitive Mark was, he would have never agreed, since he had lost each and every game.</p><p>     Mark snickered, not feeling an ounce of pity for his friend. He waved as Youngjae came back with snacks, teasing him with an odd grin.</p><p>     “You’re mean.” Youngjae said, throwing him the bag of chips and taking his seat again. Something about the scene reminded Mark of school.</p><p>     Youngjae was sitting next to him, just like he did in the classroom, only he looked completely different. His uniform jacket was hanging on the back of the chair, his white buttoned-up shirt had the sleeves folded up messily, and his tie had been pulled down sometime during an intense round. His hair was pushed back, its what he was used to doing every time he lost, so it stayed in that form. He looked casual, easygoing, even chill, something Mark wasn’t used to seeing, and something that made it so that he couldn’t stop sneaking a look at him.</p><p>     “Okay!” Youngjae stretched, then pulled himself towards the PC. “Let’s go again.”</p><p>     There was fire in Marks eyes.</p><p> </p><p>
  <strong>...</strong>
</p><p> </p><p>     Youngjae laid his head down on the desk, defeated once more. Marks shoulders could reach the ceiling at this point. After a heated battle, with Youngjae being so close to winning, Mark swooped in and won once again. He snickered. “I should go pro at this point.” He said, teasing Youngjae.</p><p>     Youngjae crumpled up his now-empty chip bag and threw it at him. “You punk!”</p><p>     Mark laughed, laying back on his chair. “What should I make you do this time…”</p><p>     “Aish what a cocky little…” Youngjae mumbled to himself.</p><p>     “What was that, slave?”</p><p>     “Nothing oh great master of pvp, your holiness, your grace!” He laughed, pretending to bow at Mark.</p><p>     “You’re making fun of me!” Marks mouth twitched up. “You know I could make you do something really embarrassing!”</p><p>     Youngjae laid back on his chair, taking a sip of his soda. “I’d like to see you try.” He mumbled, hiding his mouth behind the can.</p><p>     Mark stared at him, playful fury in his eyes. He leaned forward, tapping his cheek with a mischievous face. “Kiss me here.”</p><p>     Youngjae raised an eyebrow. “What?”</p><p>     “If you’re as brave as you’re playing off then go for it.” Mark smirked, taking a sip of his drink, relaxed as he knew Youngjae would never have the guts to do it. He was sure of himself, so he started to think of what he was actually going to make him do. His defenses down, you can just imagine the surprise on his face as Youngjae’s lips pressed against his cheek.</p><p>     “<strong><b>What the heck!!</b></strong>” Mark exclaimed, flinching back. “What are you doing??”</p><p>     Youngjae stuck his tongue out. “You thought I’d be too embarrassed to do it?” He laughed, teasing the shorter man. “Seems you don’t know me as much as you think.”</p><p>     Mark felt his chest clench. This side of Youngjae was new to him, and had completely caught him by surprise. “<strong><b>I was kidding!!</b></strong>”</p><p>     “So embarrassed you had to say it in English, eh? That’s for making me smell your sock earlier!”</p><p>Mark laughed, pushing Youngjae playfully. Noticing that Youngjae was playing around made him calm down. Soon enough they had started playing again, as if nothing had happened.</p><p>But after that exchange, Mark lost every game.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     “I can’t believe you kissed me.” Mark remarked as they walked down the sidewalk on the way to Youngjae’s house.</p><p>     “I can’t believe you let me.” Youngjae snickered.</p><p>     “Wow Youngjae, you’ve gotten way too brave.” Mark hit his shoulder lightly, in a playful manner.</p><p>     “Things have changed, I’ve found a new perspective in life.” He looked up at the night sky, pressing his lips together as if deep in thought. All Mark could do was stare, thinking of everything that had happened. He felt the air grow heavy as they stayed silent for a moment. It was as if time had stopped for Mark. He heard his heartbeat pounding in his ear. He was never the kind to get nervous, what was it about his deskmate that made him get like this? The corners of Youngjae’s mouth curled up, and it was as if the air had escaped Mark's lungs. He needed to do something, he needed to say something, or else he felt like he would burst.  </p><p>     “Youngjae, I wanted to te—</p><p>     “Ah! I forgot!” Youngjae exclaimed, popping Mark out of it. He hadn’t heard the other speak. “I found this flyer at the pc café. There’s gonna be a new retro arcade opening in town on Sunday, we should go!”</p><p>     Mark stays quiet for a moment, his chest clenching a bit painfully. “Oh, yeah sure, that sounds like fun. Let’s go then.” He agrees oddly, and they both stay quiet for the rest of the walk.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     Youngjae stood, frozen in the school hallway. It was as if the life had been sucked out of him. His face was blank, his hands were shaking, and only scary thoughts went through his mind. The thought of what was about to happen, the steps he was about to take, it chilled Youngjae to the bone.</p><p>     “Are you going in or what?” Mark knocked on the back of Youngjaes head, popping him out of his bubble. The sounds of students chatting and laughing returned to his ears, as he stood in front of the cafeteria doors.</p><p>     “I haven’t gone in there since freshman year…” He gulped.</p><p>     “Well you said it yourself, things have changed.” Mark grabbed his arm, ready to pull him in if necessary.</p><p>     Youngjae pouted, flailing slightly away from Mark like a kid being taken to the doctors office. “I don’t wanna.” He whined.</p><p>     “It's your fault for oversleeping and forgetting your lunch. Come on, I’m paying.” He pulled on his arm. Youngjae gulped, he felt bad, not just because of the situation, but because he lied to Mark and said he forgot his lunch, when his mom hadn’t even made him one. He sighed internally.</p><p>     Mark succeeded into getting Youngjae through the doors. The sight of so many people made Youngjae tense up, deciding to just go through with it to avoid causing a scene or something. They got their food and sat down at an empty table, across from each other.</p><p>     “See? It's not so bad.” Mark assured him, opening Youngjaes carton of milk for him.</p><p>     Youngjae puffed up his cheeks. “I guess not…” He said grabbing his metal chopsticks. “Thanks for buying me food.” He grinned at the metal tray filled with all sorts of yummy things. Mark looked up at him, the happiness spreading on his deskmates face as he took his first bite. Mark couldn’t stop a little smile from forming.</p><p>     “<strong><b>Hey! You’re Mark Tuan right?</b></strong>” A  voice from beside them called out. They looked up to see two other students, with trays in their hands. “<strong><b>From class A?</b></strong>”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Um, yeah, hey what's up?</b></strong>” Mark said awkwardly, shifting his view from the students to Youngjae, who was doing the same but frozen with his chopsticks in his mouth.</p><p>     The student who had spoken patted him on the back, his face lighting up. “<strong><b>Aaaah! It's so nice to finally meet you, man! I’m Jackson Wang, and this is Bambam.</b></strong>” He gestured to his taller friend behind him, who smiled awkwardly. “<strong><b>We’re from class D.</b></strong>” They sat down beside them, greeting Youngjae with a casual bow, then casually brought up a conversation with Mark.</p><p>     Jackson and Bambam were also foreign students. Bambam had moved to South Korea from Thailand four years before, and Jackson had moved from Hong Kong only two years ago. They hit it off, chatting in English about casual things and laughing amongst themselves. Youngjae couldn’t help feeling a little odd, since he still wasn’t too good at speaking in English, but he pushed it aside, smiling warmly as Jackson laughed.</p><p>     The chair next to Youngjae pulled back, and all eyes shifted up as no other than Kim Yugyeom stood there, tray in hand. He froze, bowing his head slightly, greeting them. He looked at Youngjae, as if asking him for permission to sit. Youngjae smiled slightly, so he took it as a yes and sat beside him.</p><p>     He looked at the others as they watched him quietly. “I like your watch.” He pointed at Bambams arm.</p><p>     “Oh!” Bambam jumped slightly, smiling. “You have great taste then, haha! You’re Kim Yugyeom, right? I heard about your friend, is he alright?”</p><p>     Yugyeom blinked. “Jinyoung? He’s on vacation.” He turned to Youngjae automatically. “I mean like a REAL vacation. His mom sent him off because she's divorcing his bigot father—oh, sorry, I said too much.” He looked down awkwardly.</p><p>     Youngjae smiled warmly, bending down a bit to find Yugyeom's eyes. “Let’s hope he’s having a good time then.” Yugyeom seemed to loosen up a bit, and he smiled back</p><p>     Mark noticed what his friend was doing, trying to make Yugyeom feel less awkward about everything. With Jinyoung gone, Yugyeom didn’t have anyone to be around, so Mark felt that Youngjae had identified with him, and decided to accept him. As sweet as it was, the fact that it all came back to Park Jinyoung made Mark's stomach turn. In an attempt to hide this feeling, he sprung up a conversation with Jackson. Youngjae looked up at his deskmate, now completely focusing on Jackson. Something about it didn’t sit right with him.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     It was early Sunday afternoon. The sky was clear, kids were running around, it was the perfect kind of day. Mark stood casually in a plaza. He hadn’t thought about the day much until the night before, until it dawned on him what the invitation might have meant. Still, he tried to keep his cool, pushing back any thoughts that could end in him being disappointed.</p><p>He heard footsteps quickly approaching him, and turned to see Youngjae rushing towards him. He reached Mark, bending down slightly, panting in exhaustion.</p><p>     “Sorry I’m late.” He regained his posture, smiling at his friend. Mark looked him over. Youngjae wore a slightly oversized black sweater, looking completely different from usual. Lately, that’s all Mark could think about, how Youngjae was actually so different than how he was in school. The soft and quiet, studious kid he knew at first was actually loud and confident, and loved to annoy him. In a way, Mark was glad he was able to see Youngjaes true self. “Let's go then.” Youngjae popped him out of his bubble.</p><p>     The arcade wasn’t as full as they thought it would be, but then again they should have expected this. Kids these days weren’t into these types of games, it was all about the best graphics and long hours of gameplay. But the duo was having the time of their lives, laughing like crazy as they smashed the game’s buttons so fast they felt like they could have broken it.</p><p>    They were playing a tandem retro game on a small machine, their shoulders pressed against each others from lack of space. They were both laughing, trying to push each other away to get an advantage. Mark stole a glance at Youngjae, who was so deep in the game he didn’t notice. He felt his tapping get slower, the only think keeping him from stopping altogether was his competitiveness. Mark cursed under his breath, this kept happening. Anytime he saw Youngjae, anytime Youngjae laughed, anytime he was close, it was as if time would stop. The worst thing was that Youngjae brought out the shy parts of Mark, his normal calm and cool attitude was gone as soon as he saw Youngjaes smile.</p><p>     “You better not be letting me win.” Youngjae teased, stealing a glance at Mark as well, his fingers completely stopping as he saw Mark was staring back at him. The machine emitted a strong sound, as the words GAME OVER appeared on the screen, but they almost didn’t hear it.</p><p>     “<strong><b>Yo, Tuan</b></strong>!” A hand patted Mark's back, popping him out of his bubble. They both turned to find Jackson from Class D, grinning from ear to ear. “<strong><b>Didn’t expect to see you here</b></strong>!”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Oh, hey Jackson</b></strong>.” Mark smiled politely, albeit a bit awkwardly. Bambam appeared a bit after Jackson, catching his breath. A very relaxed Yugyeom followed. It appears the duo had become quite close since their encounter in the cafeteria.</p><p>     “Jackson you can't just run off li—oh hey! It’s MarkJae, what's up?” Bambam smiled.</p><p>     “MarkJae?” Youngjae repeated.</p><p>     “You know, Mark and Youngjae. It’s your ship name.” He laughed, patting Youngjaes arm playfully.</p><p>     “Shouldn’t it be YoungMark??” Yugyeom said in a strange tone, almost like a whine.</p><p>     Bambam did an odd face. “<strong><b>What are you talking about</b></strong>, <strong><b>man</b></strong>? That sounds ridiculous.” Yugyeom bumped his shoulder against Bam’s, making Youngjae laugh.</p><p>     “<strong><b>Did you guys try out the Tekken machine yet</b></strong>?” Jackson changed the subject. “<strong><b>Bet I can beat you</b></strong>, <strong><b>Tuan</b></strong>!”</p><p>     Bambam scoffed. “<strong><b>Please, you can barely play Tetris</b></strong>.”</p><p>     Mark wasn’t one to say no to a challenge.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     Mark is walking Youngjae home as he always does. It was starting to get dark, the streetlights were starting to turn on as they both walked in silence. They ended up spending the whole day with Jackson, Bambam, and Yugyeom. Of course, Youngjae didn’t mind, but he couldn’t help but feel they were more there for Mark than him, especially Jackson who has barely said a word to him.</p><p>     In the back of his mind, Mark felt it too, but he had other things on his mind. He thought back to him waiting at the plaza, the thoughts he had then and the thoughts he had when they played together. Mark never tried to deny to himself of his feelings for Youngjae, but even so it felt so heavy on his shoulders. His mind traveled back to when he first met him, that quiet student who shared a desk with him. To think he could have liked him this much, it felt a bit overwhelming.</p><p>     Youngjae stared at his feet as he walked, feeling the awkwardness in the air. He kept thinking of the day they had, how Mark seemed instantly comfortable with Jackson, and how different it had been when he had met Mark. He couldn’t shake off the feeling, and no matter how much he thought of all the fun they’ve had together since they met, his mind kept coming back to it.</p><p>     “Youngjae.” Mark didn’t hear himself call out. He had stopped walking, neither of them had realized. Youngjae turned to look at him, his hands tensing up in the pockets of his sweater. “I—”</p><p>     They both stared at each other, about five feet apart. Youngjae felt a knot form in his throat. He tried to shake off this feeling, but he couldn’t. Mark paused, his nerves causing his hands to shake.</p><p>     “I… I-I'm sorry you got beat up because of me!” He blurted out, cursing at himself in his mind.</p><p>     Youngjaes face seemed to fall, but he instantly hid it with a soft smile. Still, his disappointment was hard to hide.</p><p>     “Don’t be stupid, Mark.” He said, turning back and continued to walk home. Mark joined him a moment later. They walked in silence, with an imaginary layer of dense fog over them. Mark screamed at himself in his head. Even so, he couldn’t help but think what would have happened if he had said what he wanted to.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Part 38 - 44</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     A couple of days have passed since Sunday. Neither Mark or Youngjae had mentioned it since. From the tension, to the awkward air around them, and an overall sleepless night for both of them, they were afraid of bringing it up. Park Jinyoung had come back from his vacation, happy and refreshed. Since Youngjae was no longer deathly afraid of the cafeteria and his mom had stopped making him lunch altogether, he and Mark had been buying food daily. Jackson and Bambam would join them as soon as they sat down, then Yugyeom, and now that he was back, Jinyoung happily sat with them, bringing Jaebum along with him. From eating in an empty classroom to being at a crowded table with people laughing and joking around, Youngjae felt odd. But overall, he was happy. He spent all his high school years avoiding people, now he felt like he somewhat belonged somewhere. The 7 boys had become comfortable with one another, it came naturally.</p><p>     “So, Youngjae.” Jaebum said, leaning on the table. “Jinyoung tells me you play piano?”</p><p>     Yugyeom speaks with food in his mouth. “Really?? I didn’t know that!”</p><p>     Youngjae shook his hands in front of him. “N-no, well yeah, but I’m not that good at it…”</p><p>     “Is he good, Mark?” Bambam turns to Mark, who freezes with his cup of juice in his hand.</p><p>     “<strong><b>I dunno</b></strong>…” He murmurs out. “I’ve never heard him play.”</p><p>     “Youngjae is amazing! He was a child prodigy.” Jinyoung radiates pride in his old friend, grinning from ear to ear.</p><p>     “I haven’t played in a long time…”</p><p>     “Honestly, you should send an application to that prestigious music school in Seoul, they’d be BEGGING you to study there.”</p><p>     Youngjae waved his hands in front of him, pushing away the thought. “My parents would probably disown me if I even considered that.” He laughed, only half-joking.</p><p>     “Ugh, parents <em>SUCK</em>.” Yugyeom chimed in. “Mine want me to go to medical school, they’ve been saying it since I mentioned being a doctor back when I was like five or something.”</p><p>     Youngjae pointed at himself, gulping down his juice. “Law school.” He said. Yugyeom grimaced, identifying with him.</p><p>     “Jaebum is going to Law School, too.” Jinyoung said pointing to the class president, who blinked awkwardly as the conversation had suddenly shifted to him.</p><p>     “<strong><em><b>Damn</b></em></strong>, I feel bad for you guys… My mom just wants me to actually graduate High School.” Bambam laughed, hoping it would bring up the mood.</p><p>     “If I was your mom I’d be worried, too! You’re barely passing Korean History.” Jackson called him out, pointing at him like a nagging mother.</p><p><em>     "<strong>Look</strong></em><strong><em><b> who’s talking</b></em></strong>!! You’re lucky you got that Fencing scholarship!” Bambam spat back, slightly agitated. Jackson batted his eyelashes playfully, pushing strands of his brown hair behind his ear.</p><p>     “What about you, Mark? Are your parents annoying you with college stuff, too?” Yugyeom asked, noticing Mark had been quiet this whole time.</p><p>     Mark looked up from his now-empty food tray, thinking of his answer. “Mine? Well, I wouldn’t say they don’t <em>CARE</em> about what I study… Dad would like it if I inherit his company after all. But they aren’t forcing it, they’ve asked me a lot of times if it's what I really want to do, so I guess I’m lucky.”</p><p>     “Your parents seem nice at least, guess they’re not all bad.” Jinyoung pressed his lips together awkwardly. Jaebum pet his back softly to comfort him.</p><p>     Youngjae changed the subject. “I just noticed, I’ve never met your parents.”</p><p>     Mark rolled his eyes in an annoyed manner. “At this point, you won't ever be able to. My parents are in their fifth honeymoon stage, they’re never home. Every week they go off to some random island in the Caribbean. This weekend they’re going to some place called St. Barths Island.” He shook his head disapprovingly.</p><p>     “Woooah that's insane!” Yugyeom exclaimed, a spark forming in his eyes. “If this were a teen movie, you’d be having a big party!!”</p><p>     Bambam turned to him, laughing. “<strong><b>Spring break, spring break</b></strong>!”</p><p>     “Mark you should totally have a party at your home!” Jackson joined in the hype.</p><p>     “Ya, you guys shouldn’t be making plans without Mark's consent!” Jinyoung scolded them. Youngjae snickered.</p><p>     The new kid stayed quiet for a second, thinking. “No party, but you guys could come over and stay the weekend, if you want. I don’t mind the company.”</p><p>     Jackson, Bambam, and Yugyeom looked at each other, excited. “<strong><b>Spring break spring break</b></strong>!!” They chanted in unison.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     Just one look at the Tuan residence could tell you just how well off they really were. The house was ginormous, two floors high with a modern-looking architecture. Not only that, it was located in the “fancy” neighborhood of their town. Marks father’s company must be thriving if he could afford this AND weekly vacations to the Caribbean. The inside was just as lavish. It was spacious, with modern/expensive-looking furniture, the living room including a large fireplace, a flat-screen SmartTV, and a pure-white grand piano.</p><p>     “Who knew Mark was actually a <em>Chaebol</em>.” Bambam laughed, taking a handful of chips and stuffing his face. They seven of them were sitting on the floor in a circle, surrounding a mountain of snacks.</p><p>     “Whats a Chaebol?” Mark raised an eyebrow, this being the first time he’s heard the word.</p><p>     “A handsome rich boy.” Bambam added.</p><p>     “I won't even begin to tell you how wrong you are.” Jaebum rolled his eyes, taking a sip from his cola.</p><p>     “Yo!” Jackson exclaimed, suddenly excited, but then proceeded to whisper. “Do you have a <strong><b>butler</b></strong>?”</p><p>     Mark did an odd face. “<strong><b>What is this, the 1900’s</b></strong>? No <strong><b>butler</b></strong>, but we do have Minsook-ssi, our housekeeper. She helps clean the house and cooks dinner for us sometimes, but she doesn’t come on weekends.”</p><p>     Jinyoung looked up from his bag of Home Run Ball, his favorite as he’s said multiple times that day, to find Youngjae gazing to the other side of the room. He followed his gaze and found Youngjaes object of interest, the grand piano of course!</p><p>     “You should play, Youngjae.” Jinyoung said softly.</p><p>     Youngjae popped back into reality, snapping his gaze back to Jinyoung in a bit of shock. “P-play what?” Jinyoung smiled softly, gesturing towards the piano with a gentle movement of his head. Youngjae smiled awkwardly. “No-no I was just looking at it, it looks expensive is all.”</p><p>     “What does?” Mark popped into the conversation. He was sitting right next to Youngjae so he could hear them. Youngjae pointed at the piano, a bit embarrassed. “Oh, the piano? My mom plays that when there’s company. You can play if you want.”</p><p>     Youngjae shook his head. “No it's okay I was just wondering…” he trailed off, obviously uncomfortable.</p><p>     “On that note,” Bambam broke the silence, grabbing his bag and pulling out a brand-new bottle of some fancy-named liquor. As soon as it was out, Mark stood up and walked out of the room. “<strong><b>Spring break, y’all</b></strong>.”</p><p>     “<strong><b>You did not!</b></strong>” Jackson raised his voice, pretending to be concerned.</p><p>     “<strong><b>I did, man.</b></strong>” Bam grinned. The others eyed the bottle, some of them taking a second to realize what it was.</p><p>     “Ya, you should have asked Mark if it was okay beforehand.” Jaebum smacked Bambam on the back of the head.</p><p>     “He did.” Mark said, returning with a tray of shot glasses and bottles of water to avoid any mishaps.</p><p>     Jinyoung scoffed playfully. “Wow, Tuan Mark, didn’t expect you to be a party guy.”</p><p>     “He’s from LA.” Bam announced as if it explained everything. Mark ignored him, sitting back down in his spot next to Youngjae, bending forward put the tray in the middle. On his way back he whispered, low enough so that only Youngjae could hear him.</p><p>     “You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to, ok?”</p><p>     “Hey, but we’re underage.” Yugyeoms voice rang on the other side of Youngjae, taking his attention before he even had a moment to react to Mark.</p><p>     “Only for a few more months, man, it's fine!” Jackson sang out.</p><p>     “Hey don’t say that, it’s okay if he doesn’t want to, we shouldn’t force anybody.” Jinyoung chimed in, supporting his friend.</p><p>     “No, I didn’t mean it like that! I meant what if we get in trouble?”</p><p>     “My parents won’t be back until Tuesday, and Minsook-ssi only works weekdays so nobody will be around.” Mark sipped some water.</p><p>     “It really is like a teen movie.” Youngjae chuckled softly.</p><p>     “Ok, let's ask this once though, is there anybody that isn’t okay with this and doesn’t want to? We won’t judge you.”</p><p>     “Not that I don’t want to, but at least one of us should stay sober so I’ll take one for the team.” Jaebum said, giving a thumbs up.</p><p>     “Waaa!” Jinyoung exclaimed in awe. “Just what a class president would do. I love you even more no--” Jaebum pinched Jinyoungs nose, pulling it gently.</p><p>     “Don't push it, if you blackout you’re sleeping with Bambam.” he said in a menacing tone.</p><p>     “Yes sir.”</p><p>     “That goes for all of you.” He pointed at all of them and then directly at Bambam, who pouted.</p><p>     “Youngjae?” Jackson called, as if asking if he was okay with it.</p><p>     “If I wasn’t okay with it I would have said something already, you guys worry too much.”</p><p>     “That’s such a Youngjae thing to say.” Jinyoung chuckled, grabbing the bottle and pouring it into everybody’s shot glasses. “Ok, first one is a toast, then let's play some games.” He placed them in front of every person that was drinking. Youngjae stared at the drink in front of him, analyzing what was about to happen. Mark looked at him, but his deskmate didn’t notice.</p><p>     “Is it your first time too?” Yugyeom popped him out of his bubble. Youngjae pressed his lips together in a shy smile. “I’m a bit scared too, but we’re safe here and with good people, so I think it’ll be okay.” Yugyeom smiled.</p><p>     “Wow, Gyeomie got all sentimental, what happened to you?” Jinyoung chuckled, amazed at his best friend's complete change in character.</p><p>     “Hey don’t tease me! I’m just trying to make Youngjae feel calmer.”</p><p>     “Is this the same boy who took a punch from that thug last year without even reacting?? For the longest time I thought you were a robot.”</p><p>     Yugyeom looked down, his face turning a soft pink. “Things are different now.”</p><p>     Youngjae looked at him, remembering the look on his face that day in the alley. That Yugyeom… that wasn’t the one sitting next to him right now. He didn’t even have to say it, just by trying to cheer him up, and the little polite things he had done the past few weeks, Youngjae knew he resented what he did, and that he was trying to make up for it. Youngjae smiled, bumping his shoulder onto Yugyeoms, whose eyes shot up to meet his. Their eyes had a silent conversation, and Yugyeom slowly smiled back.</p><p>     On the other side, Mark was still looking through the corner of his eye. He was uneasy, knowing part of the history the two both had. The feeling in his gut, he tried to rule it out as mistrust, but the second Youngjae and Yugyeom smiled at each other and the feeling intensified, deep down he knew that was just an excuse.</p><p>     “Okay then Mr. President, you should give a speech.” Bambam said, bringing all but one pair of eyes’ attention to Jaebum. He flinched, giving Bam an annoyed look.</p><p>     “Not a speech but… How about just a cheer? Something cheesy like… To new friends?” He raised his bottle of water awkwardly.</p><p>     “To new friends!” Jinyoung mocked him dramatically. “Here here!” He tried to take a sip, but Jaebums arm wrapped around his neck as he pulled him into a headlock.</p><p>     The boys laughed, all going down for their own drink. Youngjae looked down at the drink in front of him, but before he could grab it, in one swift movement Mark swooped it up to his mouth, drank it, then put the shot glass back on the floor upside-down without even reacting.</p><p>     ‘<em>He’s done this before…</em>’ Youngjae thought. He became annoyed as he realized what Mark had done. ‘<em>Does he always have to treat me like a child?</em>’ He looked over at Yugyeom, taking the shot glass from his hand and drinking it, grimacing slightly as the strong bitterness of alcohol hits his mouth for the first time, his throat and stomach heating up as he swallows it down. Mark chuckles, only fueling Youngjaes annoyance. He glared at him as Mark took his own shot, this time looking directly at him with a smug expression.</p><p>     On the other side of the pile of snacks, now released from the headlock, Jinyoung was frozen as he saw the whole thing unfold. It took him a second to comprehend, but once he did, a small, sly grin appeared on his face. He hid his mouth with his shot glass, ready to drink it, as he murmured to himself. “Interesting…”</p><p> </p><p>...</p><p> </p><p>     “PUT IT DOWN KIM YUGYEOM!!” Jinyoung yelled pointing at his friend.</p><p>     “WHAT DO YOU MEAN PUT IT DOWN?!” Yugyeom yelled back, feeling attacked.</p><p>     Jinyoung stood up, ready to throw hands. “I KNOW FOR A FACT YOU CRIED WHEN WE SAW THAT STUPID ROM-COM AT YOUR HOUSE!”</p><p>     “I DID NOT!” He stood as well, balling up one of his fists. “IT WAS LATE AND I WAS <em><span class="u">YAWNING</span></em>!!”</p><p>     “This is the most heated game of Never Have I Ever I have ever played.” Jaebum chuckled, watching as the alcohol was starting to affect the group.</p><p>     For the past hour, as suggested by Bambam, the group had been playing a not-so-calm game of Never Have I Ever. The rules were simple, don’t lie, no skipping, you’re allowed to call bullshit, and when all five of your fingers were down you had to take a shot and start again. By now, all of them had lost at least once, Mark being the odd one out and losing two times, almost at his third.</p><p>     “Stop lying and EMBRACE IT KIM YUGYEOM!” Jinyoung said dramatically, pulling his friend into a hug. As he did, Yugyeom slowly lowered his shoulders, and soon after, one of his fingers.</p><p>     “Alright next one!” Bam called for attention as he pressed the screen of his phone, he had an app that gave the prompts because they were all too stupid to come up with something themselves. “Never have I ever… skinny dipped in a pool.”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Damnit</b></strong>.” Mark said under his breath, pouring himself up another shot and drinking it.</p><p>     Jaebum laughed. “Damn Mark, you’ve done a lot of weird things.”</p><p>     “I told you!” Jackson chimed in. “American boys are <strong><b>wild</b></strong>.”</p><p>     Jinyoung leaned over to his partner's ear, whispering loud enough so that people would hear. “Put your finger down, babe.”</p><p>     Jaebum froze, staring at the stack of snacks as he slowly put one of his fingers down, causing the rest of them to react dramatically with whooping and ewws, all while a sly grin appeared on Jinyoungs face. “I’ll get you for this, Park.” There was fire in his eyes, but Jinyoung laughed and gave him a tight hug.</p><p>     Jinyoung regained himself. “<strong><b>Let's go let's go</b></strong>.” Mark could see how excited he was, and he didn’t know if this was the five shots of alcohol he had, but he understood. After all the time he spent being miserable, he was finally having a good time, being himself with a good group of friends that accept him. Mark couldn’t help but smile, for once, he felt like he could actually grow to like Jinyoung a lot.</p><p>     “Never have I ever... oh boy…” Bambam trailed off.</p><p>     “What is it?” Yugyeom asked, a little dazed.</p><p>     “Maybe we should skip this o--”</p><p>     “No skipping!” Jackson snatched the phone from Bam's hand, reading loud and proud. “Never have I ever had a crush on my best fr--” he cut himself off, realizing.</p><p>     Of course, they all knew, how could they not when it was the talk of the whole school. It didn’t take long for the students to pinpoint just who the Phoenix was talking about. Still, they all avoided looking at him, all except for Mark, who stared as Jinyoung's expression changed in realization. For a moment, he seemed like a lost puppy, until he found Mark's gaze. They stared at each other for a second, and Jinyoung's expression changed slightly, into something Mark couldn’t quite pin-point.</p><p>     “Well, we’re all friends now right?” Jinyoung said, the change in his mood was clear as day. Their stare-down quietly continued, and as if on cue, both of them put their fingers down. And as they did, a smirk crawled onto Jinyoungs face.</p><p>     Little did anybody realize, they had all put a finger down.</p><p>     “Oh, Youngjae all your fingers are down!” Yugyeom broke the silence, exclaiming in an attempt to distract everybody. “Shot shot shot!!”</p><p>     Jaebum spoke up.  “Can we change the rule? Youngjaes face is already red, it’s dangerous since he hasn’t had alcohol before tonight.”</p><p>     “I’m okay.” Youngjae said. Mark finally broke from his staring contest with Jinyoung to look at his deskmate, who had been quiet all this time.</p><p>     “Should we make him do a dare?” Jackson straightened up in excitement.</p><p>     Mark snickered, remembering the last time Youngjae was dared to do something. He repositioned himself on the floor, his leg had fallen asleep.</p><p>     “Mark looks smug,” Jinyoung grinned, raising an eyebrow. “I’m guessing you know what to dare him to do.”</p><p>     The host gave Jinyoung a confirming look, as if they both had concocted an evil plan. “I might.” He toyed.</p><p>     Youngjae scoffed. “You know better than anyone that I don’t back down from a dare.” He teased Mark, crossing his arms with a wide grin on his face.</p><p>     Bambam looked at Yugyeom, asking ‘<em>What's going on?</em>’ with his eyes. Yugyeoms eyes answered ‘<em>I have no idea.</em>’</p><p>     “Oh really?” Mark toyed, the way he spoke sent shivers down Youngjaes spine, and he hoped he wouldn’t notice. “Well, you know what I want then.”</p><p>     Jaebum choked on his water, looking over at Jinyoung, who raised an eyebrow at him.  Park leaned in to whisper into his boyfriend's ear, this time low enough that only he could hear. “Called it.” He said.</p><p>     Youngjae poked his tongue on the inside of his cheek as he spoke. “What then?”</p><p>     Mark leaned in, looking him dead in the eyes. Youngjae balled up his fists, trying to stay completely emotionless. After a second, Mark shifted his eyes to something behind Youngjae, who slowly realized and turned his head to see what it was. Once he realized, his heart sank. Mark was looking directly at the object he had been staring at all night, the ivory keys he had been avoiding for years. Suddenly it was as if it had gotten bigger, looming over him like it did when he was a child. He took an unconscious sharp breath, turning back to Mark, who had shifted his view back to him.</p><p>     “You don’t back down, right?” He said, less intimidating than before, almost as if he was comforting him instead.</p><p>     He felt a nudge on his knee, turning to see Jinyoung bent over the pile of snacks, encouraging him with a soft smile. Youngjae looked around the room and saw that everybody was looking at him with excitement in their eyes, and he doesn’t know if it was the alcohol, but to him, it looked like they knew what it meant to him.</p><p>     Youngjae softly stood up, slightly dizzy from what he had drunk, but still sober enough to not tumble over. He slowly made his way across the room, every step he took fueled his nervousness more and more. He balled up his fist again in an attempt to keep himself from stressing out. As soon as he reached it, he plopped down on the little white bench. The piano seemed to stare back at him, in a way it felt comforting, even inviting. He raised a hand, almost tempted to look back at his friends for reassurance, but he decided against it. No, this was something Youngjae had to do for himself.</p><p>     His finger tapped on a cold ivory key, the sound sending an electric shock through Youngjaes body. He straightened up, and his hands went into position before he could even think about it, like instinct, like it hadn’t been three years since he last played but mere minutes. His fingers fluttered on the keys, he didn’t even have to force it, they moved by themselves. Youngjae bit his lip, holding back a smile as a familiar song started to play. Of course, his soul would choose this song.</p><p>     “Chopin.” Jinyoung said under his breath, loud enough so Mark could hear him. “Nocturnes No. 13. He played this song back in a recital when we were in middle school. Things were so different back then…” he trailed off, lost in thought as he took out his phone and began recording him. The song crescendoed, and it was as if Youngjae was possessed by the music, playing with his whole body.</p><p>     ‘<em>The poster in his room…</em>’ Mark thought, realizing the importance of it all. He couldn’t help but smile, what he thought was so simple meant so much to his friend. He saw as Youngjaes body moved to the rhythm as the song continued, and somehow he knew things would be different now, in a good way.</p><p>     The last few notes came out, ever so gently, and as silence filled the room, Youngjae felt like he could breathe again. Only now did he allow himself to smile.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     The boys laid on the floor of Mark's living room. They had no idea what time it was but honestly, they didn’t even care at this point. Bambam was sprawled against Yugyeom who’s head was bobbing. Youngjae was telling Bam about a movie he saw once, giggling to himself every few seconds. Jaebum was watching something on his phone while Jinyoung laid his head on his lap, completely relaxed.</p><p>     Mark stretched, knowing it was about time they just all passed out until morning. “I’ll get some blankets so we can all sleep here.”</p><p>     Jackson stood up almost on cue. “I can help.” He smiled. Youngjae looked up at the two, a knot forming in his throat.</p><p>     Mark led the way to the second floor as Jackson followed, making small talk about the decorations and things Mark just wasn’t interested in. They made it to the closet. The host opened the door, walking into the room that was bigger than Jackson expected.</p><p>     “<strong><b>Ok I’ll grab some and hand them over, we should have brought someone taller with u</b></strong>--” Mark heard the door shut behind him, and turned to find Jackson sheepishly standing in front of it. “<strong><b>Why’d you close the door</b></strong>?”</p><p>     Jackson hesitated, taking a sharp breath. In one swift movement, Jackson stepped forward, grabbed Mark's face, and pressed his lips against his. Mark flinched, grabbing the other by the shoulders and gently pushed him away. “Jack--” His eyes shifted to the door behind him, now opened. He barely saw a head of soft, chestnut-colored hair before the door shut just as fast as it opened. Mark's heart stopped. Before he even realized, he was rushing out the door.</p><p>     “Mark--” The door shut again, and Jackson was alone. He scratched the back of his head and laughed softly.</p><p> </p><p>     Youngjae rushed down the hallway, not exactly sure where he was going. He couldn’t think, his head was cluttered with loud voices and millions of questions. What had he just witnessed? Was his theory true? Why did he have to see it then? That plus the extreme clenching feeling in his chest had turned him frantic, looking around for a place to lock himself up so he could calm down and process it all.</p><p>     “Youngjae!” He heard in between his thoughts. It was him, it was his voice… For some reason, the voice that would normally comfort him only fueled him with anger.</p><p>     “Leave me alone.” He heard himself say.</p><p>     Mark grabbed his arm, pulling him into the nearest room, which just happened to be his own, shutting the door behind them. “Youngjae listen to me—”</p><p>     Youngjae shook his head, coming to his senses. He looked at Mark, disgust rushing through his body in realization. “You two were really going to do that while we were still in the house?? You’re sick!”</p><p>     “It wasn’t like that!” Mark tried not to raise his voice, so that he would calm down.</p><p>     “Sure it wasn’t!” Youngjae said mockingly. “You know you really are stupid, Mark Tuan.”</p><p>     Mark felt the veins in his neck clench. “No, you’re stupid! I think you know me well enough to know I wouldn’t do something like that with him.”</p><p>     “Well, what I saw proves otherwise! Besides you two are a great fit! Maybe he should be the one helping you with your Korean!”</p><p>     Mark paused in his tracks, suddenly realizing. “Wait, THAT’S why you’ve been acting so distant?? You’re jealous??”</p><p>     Youngjae scoffed. “No! I don’t care what you do or who you date! Just do it on your own time and not when--”</p><p>     “I don’t want to date Jackson, I want to—”</p><p>     “Really, it didn’t seem like that when his tongue was down your throat!” He yelled out, completely enraged at this point.</p><p>     “Youngjae!”</p><p>     “I really thought I knew you Mark, for a second I even thought…” He stopped himself, his face falling for a split second. “Whatever. It doesn’t matter anymore.”</p><p>     And now Mark was angry, there was nothing he hated more than when people just assumed things about him and believed them no matter what he said. He dug his fingernails into his scalp, grunting in frustration. “I don’t understand you! One moment you’re all over Jinyoung practically igno—</p><p>     Youngjaes eyebrows furrowed. “What does Jinyoung have to do with this??”</p><p>     “You even stayed over at his house, trusting him so—” Mark stopped himself, he had had no control over his mouth and only now did he realize just what it seemed he was implying.</p><p>     “I’m sorry, what the hell is that supposed to mean??” Youngjae stared at him, shocked.</p><p>     “Wait I should have worded that better—”</p><p>     Youngjae raised his voice again. “Are you trying to say that I SLEPT with him??”</p><p>     “No! I—”</p><p>    “Ya, Tuan Mark. Just who the hell do you think I am??” Now it was Youngjae who was blurting things out without thinking, tears stinging in his eyes fueled by pure anger and hate. He turned to grab the doorknob, ready to run out of there, but was stopped by Mark's hand on his arm.</p><p>     “Youngjae wait—”</p><p>     He shook his hand off, turning to him. “You should know me better than to think I’d just go sleeping with someone else when I’ve liked you this whole time! Is that really what you think of me??”</p><p>     Mark just stared at him, frozen. At a moment like this, Youngjae would have become flustered at his own words, but there was nothing but anger in his eyes. He looked away, tears started streaming down his face. “And just like that, you’re silent again. Typical.” He turned around and before Mark could even think to react, he slammed the door closed.</p><p>     The room became quiet, and only now did Mark realize he hadn’t been breathing. He staggered back, suddenly weak, but instead of the floor, he was greeted by soft cotton sheets. He laid back on his bed, a million thoughts going through his mind. He pulled at his hair, letting out a soft sob.</p><p> </p><p>-Meanwhile-</p><p> </p><p>     Jackson made his way down the stairs to join the group again, only noticing Mark and Youngjae were nowhere to be seen. His heart sank, but still, he smiled. Bambam was now sitting upright on the floor, while Yugyeom was fast asleep on the couch.</p><p>     “Weren’t you getting blankets?” Jinyoung raised an eyebrow, only now noticing Youngjae was gone.</p><p>     “Oh yeah, but actually my parents called.” He grabbed his jacket that was on the coffee table. “Apparently mom isn't feeling well so it’s best I go home.” He looked over at Bambam, who was eyeing him oddly.</p><p>     “That’s too bad.” Jinyoung said, extending his arm for a handshake. “Hope your mom feels better soon, see you at school, man.”</p><p>     Jackson grabbed his hand firmly, a smile on his face. “I’ll take you to the gate then.” Bambam said, standing up from the floor.</p><p>     They put on their shoes, both in silence. Once they reached the gate, Jackson smiled widely at his friend. “<strong><b>Thanks man, I’ll text you later okay</b></strong>?”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Without this</b></strong>?” Jackson turned back to look at him, as the Thai boy held up his phone in his hand. Jackson pressed his lips together, taking his phone back awkwardly. “<strong><b>You told me to hold onto it in case you wanted to post some drunk nonsense on Twitter.</b></strong>”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Busted</b></strong>…” He said in a weird tone.</p><p>     Bambam crossed his arms. “<strong><b>So</b></strong>, <strong><b>what happened</b></strong>?”</p><p>     Jackson put his back against the gate's frame. There was no use in lying, Bambam was his best friend, he knows everything about him. “<strong><b>I</b></strong>…<strong><b> kissed him</b></strong>.”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Who</b></strong>,<strong><b> Mark</b></strong>?” It wasn’t really a question, Bambam already knew.</p><p>     He nodded, his eyes shifting to the floor. “<strong><b>And</b></strong>…<strong><b> Youngjae saw</b></strong>…”</p><p>     Bambam closed his eyes, letting his head drop. He knew where this was going.</p><p>     Jackson just laughed. “<strong><b>He ran after him, so I guess I got rejected</b></strong>, <strong><b>huh</b></strong>?”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Jackson</b></strong>--”</p><p>     Jackson put a hand up calmly. “<strong><b>It's alright, I won't think much of it. Shit happens right</b></strong>?” He forced out a smile, as he always did. “<strong><b>I’m gonna go home, I think it would be too awkward for me to stay</b></strong>.”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Want me to go with you</b></strong>?” His friend offered, ready to run in and grab his things the moment he’d say yes.</p><p>     Jackson looked up at the night sky, inhaling deeply through his nose. ”<strong><b>Nah I need some time to think</b></strong>.”</p><p>     “<strong><b>Jackson, he’s stupid for rejecting you</b></strong>.” Bambam blurted out without thinking, unable to keep his cool façade</p><p>     His friend just smiled. ”<strong><b>No he’s not</b></strong>, <strong><b>you shouldn’t be thinking that way, Bam. I’ll talk to you tomorrow okay</b></strong>?” Jackson waved, walking off before the Thai boy even had the chance to react. Bambam stared as Jackson disappeared into the night. He took a sharp breath, then headed back inside. It would be weird if he had left too, he thought.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>     Mark woke up in his bed, groggy and slightly hungover. Visions of the night before came crashing into his mind before he had the chance to realize he was awake. He rubbed his face, trying to regain consciousness. He staggered out of bed, going to start his morning. As he walked down the hall towards the bathroom, he heard laughter downstairs.</p><p>     “Youngjae, my love~” He heard Park Jinyoung sing out playfully. And without thinking, he started making his way down the stairs.</p><p>     Once he reached the first floor, the guest bathroom door opened, and out came Im Jaebum with a toothbrush in his hand. He smiled. “Morning, nice hairstyle, very chic.” Jaebum chuckled playfully as Mark patted down his messy bed hair.</p><p>     “Jaebumie, come help me!” Jinyoung called for him, catching Mark's attention again. He followed JB to the living room. Bambam and Jinyoung were huddled around a cocoon of sheets, his old enemy holding and pulling an arm that was protruding out of it.</p><p>     “Ah! Well if it isn’t Tuan Mark! You left us for dead last night, if Youngjae hadn’t come back for us and brought us sheets we would have frozen.” Jinyoung smiled, then turning back to the white sheets. “Ya, Mark is here, wake up already!”</p><p>     “What?” Mark was barely able to say.</p><p>     “Youngjae is dead.” Bambam said poking the sheets with the bottom of his toothbrush.</p><p>     “Don’t be dramatic.” Mark wasn’t sure if Jinyoung was talking to Bambam or Youngjae, but he didn’t bother to ask. “Youngjae, you really haven’t changed. He’s always been like this.”</p><p>     “Like what?” Jaebum asked, squatting next to them.</p><p>     “Impossible to wake up. I’m surprised he would make it early to school when he’s like this.” He patted the cocoon. “Wake up!”</p><p>     “So noisy!” Yugyeom grumbled from the couch, probably still suffering from the night before.</p><p>     Jinyoung perked up, putting his hands up in realization. “I have one trick. This would always work as kids but I’m not sure if he’s grown out of it…”</p><p>     “Do we have anything to lose?” Bambam put his toothbrush in his mouth.</p><p>     Mark stared as Jinyoung peeked his head into the sheets, right where Youngjae's head was supposed to be. His stomach turned as whatever Jinyoung did caused the cocoon to shift around.</p><p>     “There he is!” Jinyoung said, popping his head back out. “He’s actually five years old, I swear.”</p><p>     Bambam helped pull him up into a sitting position. Youngjae blinked, taking in his surroundings.</p><p>     “What did you do?” Jaebum raised his eyebrows, probably wondering if he should be worried.</p><p>     Jinyoung grinned and pat Youngjaes back. “I promised him we’d go to McDonald’s.”</p><p>     Yugyeom sat up instantly. “Are we going to McDonald's?” The couple and Bambam burst into laughter. Youngjae still had no idea where he was, and Mark thought it was best he wasn’t in the room when he came to.</p><p>     “I have some work for my Intensive Korean class I have to do so you all go ahead, I’ll stay behind.”</p><p>     “Hey, where’s Jackson?” Yugyeom rubbed the sleep out of his eyes.</p><p>     The question made Youngjae flinch a bit. Mark looked away, trying to not make eye contact. Jinyoung was the one to answer. “His mom was sick, so he left after you passed out.”</p><p>     Mark looked back and met Bambam's eyes. He had a bit of a blank expression, but Mark could tell that he knew what had happened.</p><p>     “I’m gonna go start my day now.” Mark said, adjusting the towel that was hanging from his shoulder. When he turned around, Youngjae looked up and watched as he left the room.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Part 45 - 55</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Content Warning: Panic attack</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     And just like that, their “spring break” getaway was over. It wasn’t exactly what they had planned, but it was mostly good. By two pm everybody had left, Mark didn’t even send them off. Instead he laid on his bed staring at the ceiling. Once he heard a commotion outside, he looked out of his window and saw his friends, laughing as they walked out of the gates. His heart sank as he thought of it, he wanted to go with them of course, but he knew it wasn’t the right thing to do now. He spent the whole day laying there, deep in thought.</p>
<p>     Monday came around faster than usual. Mark dragged his feet on the pavement, still half asleep. After a horrible, sleepless night of dreading coming to school in the morning, he was surprised his body hadn’t just shut down already.</p>
<p>     Even so, all he could think about was how his deskmate was feeling right now. He thought of the tears streaming down Youngjaes face, and how angry he was… And that was in front of him, he couldn’t imagine how it must have been on his own. He remembered the day Youngjae stayed home after the incident with Jinyoung, how the chair next to him in class was empty, what if he wasn’t there now? What would he do when they ask about him? What if Park Jinyoung asks?</p>
<p>What if he knows?</p>
<p>     What if he tries to pick a fight with him? So many thoughts were screaming in Mark's head so loud he didn’t even realize he was already walking down the halls of the school. He balled up his fists, remembering the way he heard the students say his own name the day Park Jinyoung came back to school. He hated this, every little thing was making him anxious.</p>
<p>     But all those thoughts went out the window the moment he walked into the classroom and saw that not only his deskmate was there, but he had a big grin on his face. Jinyoung and JB were standing in front of his desk, while Yugyeom was squatting next to Youngjae, propping himself up on Youngjaes desk. Mark thought of his first day at this school, and how different things were. The Choi Youngjae that was sitting alone was now surrounded by friends, smiling and laughing like he didn’t have a problem in the world. But something about it all didn’t sit right with Mark…</p>
<p>     “Oh, it’s Mark.” Jaebum noticed, pulling Mark back into reality. He adjusted his backpack and made his way in. He looked at Jinyoung, expecting a glare or an insult, but was surprised to see a large grin on his face instead.</p>
<p>     “We missed you at McDonald's, man. We stayed there until like 8pm, I’m surprised they didn’t kick us out.” Jinyoung said.</p>
<p>     “I still can't believe Bambam ate all those chicken nuggets.” Yugyeom said in an odd tone.</p>
<p>     “I know! Where does it all go?” Youngjae turned to Yugyeom, both of them started laughing.</p>
<p>     Mark couldn’t help but think something was off, but he sat down anyway. “Sounds wild.” He said a bit too softly.</p>
<p>     “Are you okay? You look sick.” Jaebum said tilting his head.</p>
<p>     Mark didn’t want to lie for once. “Oh no, I just didn’t sleep well last night.”</p>
<p>     “Did you have too much work to do?” Jinyoung recalled that the reason he hadn't gone with them Saturday was because he had lots of homework.</p>
<p>     Mark pressed his lips together in an odd smile, hoping that would serve as an answer. But instead, the group just stayed quiet, awkwardly waiting and just letting it drop.</p>
<p>     The class doors opened again. “Alright kids settle down.” The teacher called out.” Jaebum rushed to his seat to get ready to conduct the class. Yugyeom patted Youngjae in the arm with his fist and went with Jinyoung to sit at their desk.</p>
<p>     Youngjae took out his notebook, opening it up while his grin faded a bit. As it did, something clicked in Marks head. The smile he was showing now, it was the same as the day he came to school beat up. That same fake smile that had made him start to worry about him so much. He wanted to speak up, to say something to him, but the class had already started, and he didn’t want to bring any attention to them.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>     After what seemed like years, the lunch bell rang and the teacher dismissed the classroom. As students were piling out the door, Jinyoung and Yugyeom stopped by MarkJae’s desk. Mark was putting away his things, while Youngjae was writing something down.</p>
<p>     “C’mon guys, we won't be able to get a table if we don’t hurry.” Yugyeom said with a pouty voice.</p>
<p>     Youngjae looked up from his papers, smiling. “You guys go ahead, I just need to finish something for the next class.”</p>
<p>     “Okay then.” Jinyoung said a bit too quickly. “We’ll see you two there then, don’t take too long~” He toyed with them, both of them going off to join JB at the door, who looked very confused.</p>
<p>     The doors shut and the room was completely silent. Mark sat back on his chair, the odd air causing him to tense up. He swore he could hear Youngjaes pencil against the paper.</p>
<p>     After a bit of quiet writing, Youngjae shuffled his papers and stapled them together, putting them in a folder and then in his backpack. Mark assumed this meant he was done, so he quietly stretched then stood up so they could go eat, but instead Youngjae took out his notebook and began reading his notes.</p>
<p>     “You coming?” Mark said, trying to pretend it was all okay, just as Youngjae had earlier. Youngjae pressed his lips together, invested in his notes. Anyone would believe he was studying so hard, but the random scribbles he was drawing in the corner proved otherwise. Mark stared at them quietly as they went from light and spirally to sharp and scratchy. He sat down again.</p>
<p>     Mark sighed, breaking the silence. “Look, I know you’re mad at me, but it wasn’t li--”</p>
<p>     Youngjae stood up abruptly, his chair sliding back with a loud noise. Before Mark could even react, he was already walking off. He stood up, chasing him to the back of the room reaching out to grab him as the back door swung open. They both stopped in their tracks, as Jackson stood at the door frame, completely frozen.</p>
<p>     “S-sorry.” He said. “Am I interrupting something?” Youngjaes shoulders seemed to relax. Jackson noticed, finding it almost inviting, and walked inside the classroom, closing the door behind him. He took a deep breath. “I’m really sorry about the other day. I had a bit to drink and I really wasn’t thinking straight. I hope you’re not mad at m--”</p>
<p>      “Jackson there’s no reason for me to be mad at you.” Youngjae smiled, shaking his head. “And don’t apologize, none of us were thinking straight that day.” He patted Jackson on the shoulder as he walked out of the classroom, closing the door behind him.</p>
<p>     Mark stared at the door for a second, then glanced at Jackson who seemed a bit antsy. He sighed, sitting on top of the closest desk, looking defeated.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>I’m sorry, I didn’t know you were together.</b></strong>”</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>I mean we’re not, really…</b></strong>” He said quietly, almost a little somber.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>But you still like him, I should have re--</b></strong>”</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>Jackson,</b></strong>” Mark raised his voice slightly. “<strong><b>You didn’t do anything wrong.</b></strong>”</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>Yes, I did!</b></strong>” He approached Mark, a bit frantic.“<strong><b>I kissed you and he saw and now he’s just-- I mean look at him! You guys were so close and he just-- I just-- I… I shouldn't have…</b></strong>”</p>
<p>     Mark stood up from the desk and hugged his friend in hopes of calming him down. “<strong><b>It’s not your fault. We’ll be okay</b></strong>.” He said, not just to comfort Jackson, but himself as well.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     Jinyoungs foot tapped on the stone cafeteria floor. The group had already finished eating, except of course the three of them who decided to never show up. YugBam eyed as his ears reddened with anger, trying to suppress their laughter.</p>
<p>     “Hope nothing bad happened to them.” Jaebum murmured, drinking the remainder of his juice.</p>
<p>     “Something must have happened, you could tell, right? Youngjae seemed off.”</p>
<p>     “No, I couldn’t tell. I’m surprised you could, should I be jealous?” Jaebum put his silverware on his tray, standing up to go take it away.</p>
<p>     Jinyoung looked up to him with puppy-dog eyes. “No you know it's not like that any--”</p>
<p>     “I know, I know. I’m just messing with you.” Jaebum said kissing his forehead and grabbing both their trays. “The student council is having a meeting so I should be going now. See you in class, alright?” he smiled, walking off.</p>
<p>     Bambam looked over at Yugyeom, confused. His new friend just pressed his lips together.</p>
<p>     Jinyoung stood up abruptly. “That’s it, I’m not waiting anymore. They’re gonna get a piece of my mind.” And just like that, he was storming out the cafeteria doors.</p>
<p>     Yugyeom sighed. “What's up with this k-drama bullshit…”</p>
<p>     “Tell me about it.” Bambam rolled his eyes.</p>
<p>     “S-so you know, about Jinyoung and Youngjae??”</p>
<p>     “Know what?”</p>
<p>     Yugyeom stared at him, his mind going completely blank. “Nothing.”</p>
<p>     Bambam did an odd face.  “<strong><b>Nah man you can't leave me like that</b></strong>. Spill.”</p>
<p>     After a bit of hesitation, Yugyeom sighed again, giving up. “Back before I met Jinyoung, before high school, he and Youngjae were best friends. Not just that, Jinyoung had fallen in love with him, and a lot of fucked up shit happened after then. Jinyoung started bullying Youngjae, even beating him up, and well I did too, I did anything Jinyoung asked me to. Somewhere along the way, I have no idea when, Jinyoung and Jaebum became a thing. And well you know the rest huh?”</p>
<p>     Bambam stretched his neck awkwardly. “<strong><b>Damn</b></strong>, this is even more complicated than I thought.”</p>
<p>     “Now you have to tell me what you meant.”</p>
<p>     Bambam paused, thinking it through. He had no reason to keep it, he thought. “I know what happened. Why everybody is so tense around each other.”</p>
<p>     “Something happened??” Yugyeom stood up straight, bewildered.</p>
<p>     “I trust you, Yugyeom. Don’t ever tell a soul.” His friend seemed to hesitate again, but nodded in agreement. “At the party on Friday night, Jackson made a move on Mark.”</p>
<p>     Yugyeom did a dramatic double-take. “Wait!” he flinched noticing he had raised his voice. He continued, this time in a whisper. “Jackson is into Mark??”</p>
<p>     Bambam nodded. “Thing is, Youngjae walked in on them, then Mark ran after him. I have no idea what happened afterwards but it must have gotten ugly.”</p>
<p>     “It really must have, Youngjae couldn’t even look at Mark this morning… Ok, so let me see if I got this clear, Jackson likes Mark, who is so obviously into Youngjae, (and vice versa), who was Jinyoungs first love--”</p>
<p>     “Who you like.” Bambam added, interrupting.</p>
<p>     Yugyeom froze, the hairs on his neck standing on edge. “W-what are you--”</p>
<p>     “Don't even try to deny it. <em>‘I did anything Park Jinyoung told me.’</em> I could tell the moment we met.”</p>
<p>     Yugyeom stood up, his fists balling up. “You can’t just say shit li--”</p>
<p>     “Sit down, Yugie, it’s fine. If anything, I’m the one who understands you the most.” He said, looking at the empty seat in front of him. “I know what it's like… to fall in love with your best friend.”</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     Jinyoung stomped through the hallways, muttering to himself about lousy friends and tardiness. “Thirty minutes, thirty! My food was cold by the time I ate it! I could just forget about it and not wait for them next time but NO they are getting a piece of my mind.” He reached the classroom doors, swinging them open a bit to hard. “YA, MARKJAE--” He stopped in his tracks as he noticed Youngjae wasn’t in the room, and instead it was only Mark and Wang Jackson, sitting a bit too close together. He closed the door behind him, knowing something was up.</p>
<p>     As soon as he recognized Jinyoung, Mark's face fell, and the air became dense with tension.</p>
<p>     “Where’s Youngjae?” was the only thing his mind allowed him to say. He forgot all about waiting in the cafeteria, and only focused on the serious look on Mark's face.</p>
<p>     Jackson eyed both of them, reading into the situation. “I’m going to go now, thanks for hearing me out Mark, it means a lot.” Mark shifted back to Jackson, his face becoming warm again. He smiled, patting Jackson on the arm before he left. As the classroom door closed, it became utterly quiet.</p>
<p>     “He left. A while ago.” Mark said dryly, walking back to his desk and grabbing his book bag, only to freeze at the sight of Youngjaes notebook, spread on his own desk, covered in stressful doodles. He tried to swallow the knot forming in his throat. “You should go look for him. He trusts you, for some reason.”</p>
<p>     “Mark,” Jinyoung called out, ignoring what he had just said. The sound of his name coming from Park's mouth made Mark tense up. “Can we talk for a second? Since it’s only us for the first time.”</p>
<p>     Mark slung his book bag on his back, walking off towards the back door. He had no intention of talking to or even looking at Park. Jinyoung rushed towards him with heavy footsteps, grabbing onto his arm. Mark refused to turn around, trying to pull his arm away.</p>
<p>     “Please, just hear me out okay?” Something about his voice, as much as it made Mark uneasy, convinced him that whatever he wanted to say was important. He hoped he wasn’t wrong. His shoulders relaxed, and he was able to pull his arm away, without actually realizing it was Jinyoung who had let go. Mark sighed, walking to the classroom wall, sliding down it until he was sitting. They stayed quiet, until Mark knocked on the floor next to him, as if inviting Jinyoung to sit. It wasn’t much, but it was something, Jinyoung thought as he tried not to smile. He sat down slowly, leaving a bit of space between them.</p>
<p>     “Not gonna lie, didn’t think I’d get this far.” Jinyoung began, slightly nervous. “I know you don’t like me, it's completely obvious, I know, and I don’t blame you. I’ve given you so many reasons not to, and yet…” He paused, a laugh escaping his mouth. Mark’s mouth twitched. “It's funny, you know me better than people who actually claim to like me.”</p>
<p>     Mark put his head back, already regretting sitting down. “What do you mean by that?” He said a bit more dryly than he thought he would.</p>
<p>     “I heard you that day in the shed, all those things you said to Youngjae... How could someone who had met me at the worst time of my life know all those things that I had tried so hard to lock up? I couldn’t hate you after that…” Jinyoung laughed again. “You did miss something really important though. I didn’t just start hating Youngjae because I had feelings for him, or because I was afraid of becoming like him. On the contrary, the main reason I hated him… was because I wanted to be like him.</p>
<p>     “Youngjae… he was always so confident. He never doubted who he was, he embraced it. He didn’t care what people said, not even his parents, and I… I wanted to be like that. I wanted to say fuck it and embrace who I am, but I was so scared. I’m really hard-headed, always have been, so I took it the wrong way and unleashed all this fear and anger on Youngjae. After you left that day when I, y’know, I told all of this to Youngjae, and it was like all of the weight of the world left my shoulders. I was free.</p>
<p>     “I can finally be myself and I’m making up for lost time by just letting go, Youngjae told me to. Right now, I’m channeling how he was back when we were best friends, only now… it almost feels like we’ve switched places… He keeps telling me nothings wrong but… This morning, when you came in, his face… He wasn’t like this when I used to see him with you. I know I bit your ear off and now I’m butting in but… Just be careful with him okay?”</p>
<p>     Mark looked down at his hands, pressing his tongue onto his cheek. He could finally tell why Youngjae just forgave him so easily. While Park Jinyoung was mean and rude for so long, it was eating him up so much, he was so disgusted in himself, that now he really, truly wants to turn a new leaf. He wants to be happy, he wants to make amends for the piece of shit he was. And he doesn't expect people to just forgive him. Of course Youngjae forgave him, he probably realized all this way before Park Jinyoung did. On top of it all, he really does care about Youngjae. For once, Mark didn’t have any slight suspicion about him, no thoughts of ulterior motive, and something in him made him truly believe that things would change between them. He glanced at Jinyoung, who looked up as he felt his gaze. And for the first time, Mark smiled at him. Jinyoung couldn’t help but grin, letting out a little laugh in relief.</p>
<p>     Jinyoung coughed, trying to compose himself and get back onto the subject. “I… I can tell something is off, you don’t need to tell me what but… If you’re angry at him, try to forgive him. He… He’s gonna need you…”</p>
<p>     The smile faded from Mark's face. “What are you saying?”</p>
<p>     Jinyoung pressed his lips together in an odd smile. “No, nevermind.” He stood up, brushing dust off of his pants. “Forget I said that, okay?”</p>
<p>     Mark looked up at him, a stone-cold expression on his face. “How could I?”</p>
<p>     The other boy smiled, the warm expression causing Mark to ease up. “That’s exactly what I thought you’d say.” He walked off with his hands in his pockets.</p>
<p>     Mark stared as the classroom door closed off again. He laid his head back on the wall. “<strong><b>Park Jinyoung, why are you so confusing.</b></strong>”</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     “I know, I know. I’m just messing with you.” Jaebum said kissing his forehead and grabbing both their trays. “The student council is having a meeting so I should be going now. See you in class, alright?” he smiled, walking off.</p>
<p>     After taking the dirty trays to their station, Jaebum walked out of the cafeteria and into the hallways. He checked his phone as the vice-president of the student council was blaring it up with a string of text messages. “Can't she wait until I get there to tell me everything…”</p>
<p>     A door shut loudly near him, and when he looked up he found none other than Choi Youngjae, standing there with his head hung down. He rubbed his hands over his face and then passed his fingers through his hair in anguish, hurrying off somewhere.</p>
<p>     “Yo, Youngjae, where ya going?” Jaebum called out, slightly playful. Youngjae stopped like a deer caught in the headlights, then abruptly ran off. Jaebum called after him, sprinting after him. He ended up chasing him upstairs and into a nearby bathroom. He grabbed onto Youngjaes arm before he could lock himself in a stall.</p>
<p>     “That’s enough.” Jaebum said calmly, panting as he held on with a firm yet gentle grasp on the other's bicep. Youngjaes face was red, either from running or from what he was running from. It took him a second to look at Jaebum, but once their eyes met the class president was met with the face of a man who was close to breaking down.</p>
<p>     “Don’t.” Youngjae barely whispered, sounding more like an exhale than anything. Jaebum checked the stalls, and once he noticed they were empty, he locked the bathroom door. Only now did he let go of Youngjaes arm. There was nowhere to run to, nowhere to hide. Youngjaes back hit the bathroom wall, and he slid down with a SLUMP.</p>
<p>     Jaebum loomed over him. At this moment, he wasn’t the soft-spoken class president anymore. The air around him got tense, as a sort of edgy persona took over him. Youngjae couldn’t look him in the eyes anymore, instead, he hid his head in his knees, letting out a shaky sigh.</p>
<p>     “So you told him then.” Jaebum broke the silence.</p>
<p>     “What?” The broken man replied, muffled.</p>
<p>     “Mark.”</p>
<p>     Youngjae seemed to tense up at the mention of his name, but ignored it hoping Jaebum didn’t notice. He did. “What about him?”</p>
<p>     “You confessed to him.” Youngjaes face shot up to look at him.</p>
<p>     “How did you--”</p>
<p>     Jaebum interrupted. “Oh don’t you pretend it wasn’t obvious. Even if it wasn’t, Jinyoung hasn’t been able to stop talking about it lately so how could I not know…” he stopped himself, shaking his head as if pushing a thought away. Youngjae hid his face again, defeated. “So he rejected you?”</p>
<p>     Youngjae scoffed. “That would have been so much simpler.” He murmured, almost to himself.</p>
<p>     Jaebum sat cross-legged in front of Youngjae. He was silent, but he could tell the class president was waiting for him to continue, and that there was no escaping this conversation. “They kissed-- Jackson and him I mean. On Friday, when we stayed over, I went up to help get the sheets and they were just--” He did a frantic waving motion with his hands. “Y'know! And I’m not mad about it, don’t get me wrong!” Youngjae continued, just as frantic. “They can do whatever they want, I shouldn’t be upset about it. They both think I’m angry at them or something -- I understand Mark cause I did say some things -- but I’m  not angry and it's just -- it’s annoying!”</p>
<p>     The class president just stared at him, waiting patiently as his phone kept vibrating quietly in his pocket. The student council will be furious when they catch him.</p>
<p>     “I’m not angry at them.” He repeated.</p>
<p>     “Okay,” Jaebum accepted with a grain of salt. “But you’re upset.”</p>
<p>     “Not about th--”</p>
<p>     “Then about what? What are you upset about? Why couldn’t you look Mark in the face earlier? Why did you avoid us at lunch and why did you run away from me? If you’re not angry then what is eating you up so badly that you’re just shutting everybody out?”</p>
<p>     Youngjae’s head dropped as he dug his fingernails into his scalp, the stress of these past few days just consuming him and coming out all at once. “That--!! That it was just bound to happen! They both just-- … They just fit.”</p>
<p>     “Fit?”</p>
<p>     “They feed off of each other. Anything Jackson does makes Mark laugh, they can talk about anything, in English, heck even in Chinese. The moment Jackson arrived he and Mark just got along so well, when with me…” He paused, his voice growing quiet. “He barely even looked at me the day we met… it took so long before we were even able to talk to each other…” He scratched his head furiously, letting out a grunt. “I hate this! I hate this so much! I hate that I’m upset about all of this when I shouldn’t be, when I should just be happy for my friend but he thinks I’m angry at him! Because… I made it seem like I was angry at him… He really thinks I am… But I’m not, how could I be…”</p>
<p>     “Then tell him that.” Jaebum said, causing Youngjae to look up at him blankly. “Tell Mark you’re not angry at him.”</p>
<p>     Youngjae shook his head. “I can't tell him any of this yet…”</p>
<p>     “Then don’t. Yet. It’s not that complicated, just talk when you’re ready, but you’ll never be if you keep avoiding him…” Jaebum stared as Youngjae seemed to calm down at least a bit, with a slight sense of fear appearing in his eyes. He laughed to himself, catching Youngjaes attention. “And here I was, worried…”</p>
<p>     “What?”</p>
<p>     Jaebum looked at his hands, biting his lips before continuing. “No, it’s nothing. Let’s just say, I can see why Jinyoung wants to protect you, and that I’ve been taking it the wrong way.”</p>
<p>     “You’ve lost me.” Youngjae shifted, looking at Jaebum with a puzzled expression.</p>
<p>     The class president paused. “Why… Why are we all so selfish? Keeping everything to ourselves and trying to fix everybody else… You… You helped Jinyoung realize he had to fix himself first, now he’s trying to help you realize… And I took it all the wrong way…”</p>
<p>     “Jaebum?” Youngjae looked for the other's eyes, completely confused as to why it all shifted into this.</p>
<p>     The class president smiled. “Let’s go back, I need to go tell someone how much I love him.” He stood up, helping Youngjae to his feet and then going towards the door. He unlocked it and paused, unable to look at his friend. “I hope… That you can realize it too, Choi Youngjae.”</p>
<p>     Jaebum swung the door open and disappeared into the hallway. Youngjae stood frozen, the words repeating in his mind. While it had stressed him out to the point of him bursting, he was somehow glad Im Jaebum chased after him. In a way, he knew they’d both gain something from this.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     Mark sat at his desk as students began pouring in from both classroom doors. Lunch break was already over and class was set to start. His stomach rumbled, but he couldn’t think about how hungry he was. No, he had too much to think about. Even so, his mind was in jambles, everything was such a mess. It overwhelmed him, to say the least. He kept looking over at the empty chair next to his, wondering if it would stay empty for the rest of the day. Would he have to bring Youngjae his bag? No, he thought it was probably best to send Park Jinyoung to do it. Out of curiosity, he looked back at Park, sitting at his old desk with a blank-faced Yugyeom next to him. It took him a second to realize Jinyoung was staring at Youngjaes desk as well, but once he felt Mark’s gaze their eyes met. After a long second, Jinyoung smiled warmly, a bit too solemn even. Mark gave him a little nod.</p>
<p>     “THERE YOU ARE!” Mark's head shot to the front of the classroom as a student yelled. His half-second of hope was quickly broken as he saw a girl grabbing no other than Jaebum by the collar. “You think you can just ignore my calls just because you’re the president?!”</p>
<p>     “Something came up, sorry.” Jaebum laughed as the short girl tried to intimidate him. He shot a glance at what Mark assumed to be Jinyoung, giving him a little wink.</p>
<p>     The seat next to Mark pulled back, causing him to jump. He looked up out of shock to see his deskmate calmly sitting down. His face shot back to the classroom door being closed with a loud CLACK, the teacher standing in front of it calling the students to order. Mark shifted in his chair, trying to hide the relief going through his body. For a second, his shoulders relaxed, but he knew he wasn’t out of the war zone yet. Still, he was relieved.</p>
<p>     The class began. Every once in a while Mark couldn’t help but peak at his deskmates notes. There were no more stressful doodles, which calmed him down a bit in an odd way. He looked forward again, trying to pay as much attention as he could. This teacher hated talking while he was teaching, so he couldn’t just try to start up a conversation with Youngjae, not that he would even dare to. Not with how bad things ended last time he tried to talk to him. He ended up looking back at his deskmates notes out of nerves. He hoped to god that Youngjae couldn’t tell he was.</p>
<p>     But he could. He looked as Mark eyed his notes time after time. He tried not to smile. They kept saying Mark was a wild American boy, but only Youngjae knew the soft, silly things he did. He moved his hand, as if pretending to twitch. Mark's head shifted back to his own notes. This time Youngjae didn’t hold back his smile. He felt a bit nostalgic, being silly like this with Mark, teasing him. He thought of how he was so stressed out, and he couldn’t imagine how Mark was feeling too. Jaebum’s voice rang in his ears, and he knew he was right. Youngjae looked up to the teacher, who was facing the chalkboard, and then at his deskmate who was slowly writing in his notebook. There was no use hesitating, Youngjae thought as he glided his hand onto the upper part of the page Mark was writing on.</p>
<p>     Mark jumped as he noticed Youngjaes hand on his notebook, scribbling something on the top. His chubby little hand was covering what he was writing. Time seemed to slow down for Mark, as he anticipated what he was writing. He didn’t know if he should be worried, or even scared. He clenched his own pencil, the plastic felt like it would snap in half. Youngjae pulled back his hand, instantly going back to writing in his notebook and revealing what he had written.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>     ‘ <strong><b>I’m not angry </b></strong> ’</p>
<p> </p>
<p>     Three little words written in Youngjae's English handwriting. That’s all it took to make all the stress clouding Marks mind escape his mouth in a sudden, shaky sigh. Youngjae heard it, smiling to himself as he wrote down whatever the teacher was talking about. Mark stared at these words, thanking the heavens Youngjae was sitting on his left side, so he couldn’t see that on his right cheek, a single tear had rushed down.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     A week had gone by since then. While still a bit awkward with each other, Mark and Youngjae would be okay in each others company. Youngjae was still holding back, still shaken up from all that happened, and Mark was still stressed out from the uncertainty of things, but they both said they’d hold off until they were both ready to talk. Even so, they barely talked outside of school.</p>
<p>     The day after the incident, Youngjae had texted Mark, telling him he wasn’t ready to tell him everything yet or to even talk about it, but that he would when he was. He told Mark he trusted him, and that he would never be fake with him, and that that was his promise to Mark for not hating him after the things he said. It wasn’t much, but it was something. On Tuesday, they had already started joining the others for lunch again. It took Jackson three days, but he came back as well. And just like that, they were all joking and having fun as high school students should.</p>
<p>     Mark stretched in his chair, letting out a small grunt. The school day was finally ending, so now he could go home and relax for the remainder of the evening.</p>
<p>     “You seem happy, Tuan.” Jinyoung patted him on the shoulder, a sore Yugyeom looming behind him. Mark only smiled at them.</p>
<p>     Youngjae yawned loudly, getting up from his chair. “I’m starving.” he said mid-yawn.</p>
<p>     “That's what you get for not eating your lunch today!” Jaebum scolded him.</p>
<p>     Youngjae stuck out his tongue. “It had cucumbers in it, I cant eat those. <strong><b>Not my type</b></strong>!” Mark laughed.</p>
<p>     “Mr. Choi?” The homeroom teacher popped into the now almost empty classroom. The group of friends looked up at her, suddenly completely quiet and serious.</p>
<p>     “Y-yes?” Youngjae straightened up, putting his hands together in front of him.</p>
<p>     “May I speak to you and Park Jinyoung for a second?” She made her way over, glancing at the rest of the boys, and lastly to Jinyoung, to whom she gave a slight smile.</p>
<p>     At that sight, Jinyoung put his hand on Marks shoulder, as in telling him to stay. The teacher looked at both of them then pressed her lips in acceptance. Jaebum and Yugyeom awkwardly said goodbye and shuffled out of the classroom. Once they opened the door, they saw Bambam and Jackson peeking in, confused when they were pushed away from the door before it closed again.</p>
<p>     The teacher made her way to the front of Youngjaes desk, where he was still standing. Mr. Park told me about your <em>situation</em>.”</p>
<p>     Youngjae froze. Mark looked up at Jinyoung, who was staring at the floor. “M-my situation?”</p>
<p>     She put her tiny hand on Youngjaes shoulder. “I know what its like, to have parents who think they know whats best for our future, going against our own wants.”</p>
<p>     Marks fist clenched under the table. Youngjae was good at hiding it, but Mark could tell he was considering just running out of the classroom.</p>
<p>     “My parents were like that too. They were devastated when I told them I wanted to teach. I used to resent them so much, but I’ve never regretted choosing my own path. And neither should you.” She smiled, pulling out a letter from the folder in her arms. “I’m sorry if this is invading your privacy, but we thought you should at least have a chance to choose.”</p>
<p>     Youngjae slowly grabbed the letter, inspecting the front of it.</p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p> </p>
  <p>     Korea National University of Arts</p>
  <p> </p>
</blockquote><p>     He stares at the envelope for the longest time. Without thinking, he finds himself slowly tearing the letter open, pulling the contents out.</p>
<p>     “Jinyoung showed me a video of you playing, you’re so incredibly talented. I spoke with the Music teacher about it and he said there was a scholarship available, he sent the video. They responded so quickly, I have a feeling its good news.” She smiled, patting Youngjae on the arm again then walking off and out the room. The door closed with a loud CLACK, but Youngjae didn’t hear it. His hand started shaking, and he was barely able to sit down in his chair again. Mark stared, no idea what to do or what to say. He looked up to Jinyoung, who was looking directly at him this time. His eyes. Mark recognized that look, it was the same one he had when they had that talk in the classroom.</p>
<p>
  <em>     ‘He’s gonna need you…’</em>
</p>
<p>     The back door swung open again, and in came their group of friends. “EY YO!” Bambam yells out, leading the group with his long legs.</p>
<p>     “What was that all about?” Yugyeom pouted as they joined the trio.</p>
<p>     Jinyoung perked up, suddenly smiling. “I’ll tell you!” He snapped the letter out of Youngjaes hands, barely giving him time to react. He walked off, reading as if it was a performance. “To Choi Youngjae, of class A at Hanlim High School.” Mark looked at Youngjae, who took a second to analyze what was happening. His head popped up, and he tried to call Jinyoung over. “We reach out to you to inform you that you are qualified to apply to the Special Honors Scholarship at the Korean National University of Arts. Please contact--” Mark ripped the paper out of Jinyoungs hands, the latter looking at him not with shock or anger, but instead a hint of respect showed in his eyes. But alas, Mark was too late and the damage was already done.</p>
<p>     “Whoa Youngjae!” Jaebum grabbed him by the shoulders, shaking him excitedly. “Congratulations! See, we told you, you have so much talent!”</p>
<p>     “Damn, a whole scholarship!” Bambam said dramatically.</p>
<p>     Jackson put his hand on Youngjaes shoulder, smiling at him warmly. “Congratulations Youngjae! You really deserve this.”</p>
<p>     “Cute! He’s in shock!” Yugyeom said, crouching next to Youngjaes desk.</p>
<p>     Mark stared at Jinyoung. “…you--” he began to say, but was interrupted by Jinyoung calling out to the group.</p>
<p>     “Let’s go celebrate! Dinner’s on me!”</p>
<p>     The group rejoiced at the thought of free food. They grabbed onto Youngjae, parading him as if he was just named the king of planet Earth. Mark stood frozen, looking as his friend was being pulled away with a blank, scared expression on his face. Jinyoung grabbed his arm, pulling him out of the classroom as well.</p>
<p>     “You can yell at me or even beat me up later. Right now, this needs to happen.” He whispered. Mark looked out in front of them as they zoomed past the hallways and onto the streets. Somehow, he really wished Jinyoung was right.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>     “A toast to Youngjae!!” Bambam called out, soda in hand.</p>
<p>     “That’s the fourth toast you’ve done tonight!” Jackson yelled out, annoyed.</p>
<p>     “Yeah sit down!” Yugyeom whined, pulling on Bams shirt.</p>
<p>     Pizza. Of course, a group of seven highschoolers would go celebrate by getting pizza together. Not that anybody was complaining, especially not Jinyoungs wallet. They were all huddled up in a corner booth of the best pizzeria in their town.</p>
<p>     Mark had been quiet the whole night. He was sitting next to Youngjae, who was exactly in the middle of the booth, trapped between him and Jinyoung on the other side. He had no way of running off. At some point during the evening he had begun to smile at everyone, Mark of course knew it was fake but at least he wasn’t completely blank like before. Once in a while, he would try to comfort him, either by helping him grabbing more food or patting his knee under the table. He felt a bit silly, but he thought he needed to at least do something.</p>
<p>     It was getting late, Mark kept checking his watch, he didn’t want to miss one of the last buses home. Of course, he could always get a cab, but he hated the thought of it. Something about being alone with a random stranger gave him bad vibes.</p>
<p>     Bambams phone dinged, making him straighten up, surprised. Once he took a look, his face changed to what seemed to be a tinge of fear. “So, I gotta go. Mom says I better be home in 15 minutes or I’m sleeping outside.”</p>
<p>     “We should all be heading home.” Jaebum yawned, checking his watch and flinching when he noticed just how late it was.</p>
<p>     “Mark, don’t you take the bus home? You might miss it if you don’t hurry.” Jinyoung said, a bit oddly.</p>
<p>     Mark just stared for a second, trying to analyze Jinyoung, as he always did. Something about the way Jinyoung spoke made him uneasy, and he sure as hell wasn’t about to leave him alone with Youngjae “…I can just call a cab.”</p>
<p>     He felt a sudden nudge on his knee, and it took him a second to realize it was Youngjae who had done it. Mark sat up straight, looking over at his deskmate, who sipped on his soda nonchalantly. He turned to him, a big fake grin on his face. “You should go, your parents must be worried about you.”</p>
<p>     Mark's heart sank, he absolutely hated it when Youngjae got like this. He was so used to it, smiling like he didn’t have a care in the world when in reality Mark knew he was close to breaking down. If he didn’t know him, he probably would have believed it was real. Mark pressed his lips together forming a line, defeated. He nudged Yugyeom who was sitting at his side, as if telling him to move out so he could get out of the booth. Once the taller boy was out, Mark began to slide out, but paused. He slid back towards Youngjae, getting close so he could whisper in his ear, using his hand to cover his mouth.</p>
<p>     “You said you’d never be fake with me, Youngjae. I believed you.” he whispered. He knew he would regret saying that, but he was too much of a hothead to care right now. He swore he saw Youngjaes shoulders tense up, but a millisecond later they were relaxed. And he was… laughing?</p>
<p>     “Of course I’m going to text you later, stupid. You don’t have to whisper that!” He was good.</p>
<p>     Jaebum laughed. “You two must have made up already, glad to see you’re back to normal. See I told you it would be fine!”</p>
<p>     Mark paused, biting his tongue from the rage in his stomach. He could have said something, he could have pulled him outside, he could have done ANYTHING to help his friend, but no, his anger didn’t let him. Instead, a large grin appeared on his face, just as fake as his friend’s.</p>
<p>     “Okay, talk to you later man!” He said, a slight coldness to his voice. The corner of Youngjaes mouth twitched, but he didn’t budge. Mark slid out of the booth, waving at his friends before storming out of there without looking back</p>
<p>     Youngjae balled his fist under the table. He could barely even think. Things had been getting better and now it was all crashing down on him. He felt a hand cover his, and looked down to see Jinyoungs hand holding his firmly under the table, trying to comfort him.</p>
<p>     It didn’t.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>     Jinyoung insisted on taking Youngjae home. After calling his driver and saying goodbye to the friends that remained, they boarded the car. Youngjae looked out the backseat window, the orange glow of the lightposts lighting up the streets as the tall buildings of downtown turned into the familiar residential road he knew so well.</p>
<p>     “I still cant believe Jaebumie stuck two whole slices of pizza in his mouth. What a talent!” Jinyoung laughed, laying his head back on the upholstered seat.</p>
<p>     Youngjae stayed quiet. The air around them has been tense since they left the restaurant, no matter how many times Jinyoung tried to liven it up. Parks face fell for a second, but he smiled again almost instantly. “So I’m guessing you and Mark made up? It was nice that he came with us this time, and on such a special--”</p>
<p>     “Why did you do that?” Youngjae finally spoke, without even looking at him. The car came to a stop, they had made it to the Choi residence.</p>
<p>     “Do what?” Jinyoung asked, already knowing the answer.</p>
<p>     “Send that video.” Youngjae continued, staring at his house, the gate’s light was on but the lights inside were off. His parents must be asleep already, of course they wouldn’t wait for him. “I didn’t ask you to do that.”</p>
<p>     His friend smiled somberly, looking forward. “I just… I figured that after all the horrible things I did… that  I should at least <em>try</em> to do something good for once.”</p>
<p>     Youngjae pauses, still looking out the window. “Out of all of the heartless things you did,” He turned his head towards Jinyoung, who flinched at the icy stare he gave him, noticing a hint of something else in his glossy eyes "this was the worst.” Youngjae choked out, instantly opening the door, leaving, and closing it shut in one swift movement.  Jinyoung stares at him, frozen, as he walks through the gate. The moment he sees the gate light turn off and knows he’s inside, he smiles somberly, moving his head to look out of the window on his side.</p>
<p>     “Let’s go.” He says to his driver. The car pulls away from the curb and into the orange-tinted streets.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>     Youngjae closes the front door and out of habit turns off the outside lights. He’s greeted by the darkness that is the dining room/kitchen. The pair of fancy shoes by his feet lets him know his parents are home. Usually they're never there when he gets home, it must be later than he thought. Something about them being there, neatly placed at either side of where he puts his, it made him feel warm. If it were any other home, a loving family would have their shoes like this. After thinking of it for a second too long, he shakes off the feeling and decides to keep his shoes on. Another family would, but not Youngjaes.</p>
<p>     He turns on the dining room light. On top of the table lays an open letter. Something about it laying there fills the air with a tense atmosphere. Youngjae steps forward, his feet feeling heavy but making no sound. He looked down at the letter, his backpack sliding off of his shoulder and slumping onto the floor, as he saw the letter had his name on it.</p>
<p>     And right in the corner of the letter, in big ominous letters was the name of his parents Alma Mater, the most prestigious Law school in Seoul that accepted undergrad students.</p>
<p>     The letter had been torn open, no use wondering who had done it. He slid the papers out of the envelope, letting it fall down onto the table.</p>
<p> </p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>Dear Mr. Choi Youngjae</p>
  <p>We are delighted to inform you that you have been accepted into the Bachelors of Legal Studies pro--</p>
</blockquote><p> </p>
<p>     Youngjaes hand grabbed onto the edge of the table, supporting himself as his knees temped to buckle under him. His thumb crumples the end of the paper on his hand as he balls up his fist. His fist presses onto his chest, as Youngjae tries to force himself to breathe. The room had turned completely dark, and the feeling that the roof kept creeping down on him made Youngjae stumble back onto the wall. He looks down at his hands, visibly shaking as the shortness of breath makes everything start to fade out into black. He tastes blood in his mouth as he bites his tongue to stop himself from screaming.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     ‘<strong><b>FUCK</b></strong>.’ Mark thinks for the thousandth time since he left the restaurant. He was laying on his bed, nearly pulling out his hair in distraught. ‘<strong><b>Why today</b></strong>?? <strong><b>Why did I have to choose today to be a fucking smartass about it?? Why did I leave him there, and what the fuck is Park even doing??</b></strong>’</p>
<p>     He had been repeating the same questions since he entered the bus, scaring the old lady sitting next to him close to death with his grunts and mumbles.</p>
<p>     Taking out his phone, he stared at it for the longest time. Should he text him? Should he call? Is he okay? Could he forgive him?</p>
<p>     Could Mark forgive himself?</p>
<p>     He threw his phone beside him, covering his eyes with his forearm. ‘<strong><b>I’m a fucking idiot.</b></strong>’ he thinks to himself. The blonde thought of  Youngjae's face at the restaurant. That smile he had, how he had everybody convinced he was having a good time, how he lied to them all about what Mark had whispered. This time, Mark spoke out loud. “<strong><b>How many times did you have to fake being okay? All alone those years, I guess anybody would get used to it… I wish you didn’t though. Aargh, and here I am making things worse for you…</b></strong>” He felt a hot tear stream down his temple and onto his pillow.</p>
<p>     -DING- his phone was loud in the quietness of his room. Mark sat up abruptly, looking around for his phone in a frantic manner. Once he found it, he tapped it on, the lockscreen lighting up his face in the dark.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p>( "Save Me" )</p>
<p>
  
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>     Mark is hurrying down the stairs as he puts on his jacket. He fumbles with the key bowl, barely able to find his own. Once he does he sprints for the door. It was too late, all the buses had done their final run. He didn’t care, he would run all the way to the Choi residence if he had to. He swings the door open, almost forgetting to close it behind him. He mentally prepares to sprint off, but stops in his tracks. Dragging his feet on the stone path, still in his uniform and a piece of crumpled paper in his hand, Youngjae shuffled towards him in a daze, tears streaming down his cheeks.</p>
<p>     Mark freezes, air refusing to go into his lungs. “Youngjae! How did you get here??”</p>
<p>     Youngjae walked slowly towards him, he hadn’t heard his question. It was as if he was in a trance, as if he wasn’t even there.</p>
<p>     “They won't….” He spoke as if the words were escaping his mouth with his breathing. As he got closer, his knees buckled under him. Mark grabbed him by the elbows so he wouldn’t fall. The chestnut-haired boy looked up to him, as if he just noticed he was there. Youngjae grabbed onto Mark's shirt, digging his fingers into the fabric. The tears seemed to fall faster. “ They won’t let me go. Not now, they won’t.” Sobs invaded his words, he became more frantic as he spoke. “They never will.”</p>
<p>     Mark looked down at him, watching as his friend completely broke down in silence. He wrapped his arms around Youngjae, hiding him onto his chest. He had no idea what to do, feeling completely heartbroken as his friend was shaking in his arms. But somehow, Mark knew that right now nothing he could say would make him feel better.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Part 56 - 62</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>     Light was shining brightly through the exposed windows. Youngjae groaned awake, cursing at himself for not closing the curtains last night. It took him a second to notice, there weren't any curtains! He looked around the room, movement limited because he was wrapped up in a cocoon of white sheets. White, not navy blue like the sheets on his bed. The room was light, with white minimalistic furniture and a beefed-up gaming computer in the corner.</p>
<p>     Youngjae woke up in a bed that wasn’t his, in a room that wasn’t his, and, most likely, a house that wasn’t his. He shifted around slightly, enough that he was able to turn over, only to find that laying next to his cocoon was no other than his deskmate, Tuan Mark, sleeping soundly. Youngjae stared at him for the longest time, still half asleep and still trying to understand what had happened.</p>
<p>     Mark slept peacefully, his cheek squishing against his arm propping up his head. The room was quiet, except for the low hum of the air conditioner and the soft murmurs Mark did as he slept. Youngjae couldn’t help but smile. He felt lucky somehow, others knew Mark as this quiet, stern, tough, and wild American boy, but time after time he kept showing Youngjae his warm and soft side. Since the day they both spoke to each other, when Mark laughed so hard at something Youngjae had said. When he pulled down his mask and Youngjae swore he saw worry in his eyes. When Mark called him his friend for the first time and became flustered. The day he blushed when Youngjae kissed him on the cheek, the way he kept trying to apologize about what happened with Jinyoung. All the times he got just a bit too close, playing at the arcade, teasing him before daring him to play the piano… And now right here, sleeping so soundly next to him when he had so abruptly appeared last night, a complete mess. All these little moments, all of Marks soft spots, all the warmth he kept hidden from others, Youngjae felt lucky he was the one finding them.</p>
<p>     After a very long moment of staring lost in thought, he realized he had been hogging the sheets, and that Mark was laying bare on his own bed. He was able to sit up slightly, pulling off some of the sheets away from his cocoon and placing it on Mark. The moment he did though, with a long inhale, Mark slowly opened his eyes and looked around, stretching his back and shifting around in his spot.</p>
<p>     “Sorry…” Youngjae said, a bit more groggy than he anticipated. “You seemed cold.”</p>
<p>     Mark propped himself up on his elbows, looking at the sleepy mess of sheets that was Choi Youngjae. He couldn’t help but chuckle. “<strong><b>Good morning</b></strong>.” He said in a low sleepy voice, startling Youngjae a bit. “Your hair is a mess.”</p>
<p>     Youngjae pouted, trying to ignore the fluttering in his stomach. “Look who's talking.” He said, patting his hair down. Mark let out a little giggle, throwing himself back down on his bed, stretching in a way that made his shirt rise up a bit too high.</p>
<p>     “You sleep like a log, by the way.” He continued, trying to make some playful banter. He waited, but got no form of response. Marks eyes glanced over to the chestnut-haired boy, only to find him lost in a sort of trance, staring straight towards his desk. Following his glance, he found the slightly crumpled piece of paper Youngjae was grasping the night before. He hadn’t let go of it until he fell asleep, which didn’t exactly take too long, to be honest. Mark stretched over and grabbed the paper from the desk directly next to his bed.</p>
<p>     “Did you read it?” Youngjae said, half-present and now looking down into the hands on his lap.</p>
<p>     The blonde shook his head softly, handing over the paper. “You seemed really shaken up about it, I thought it would be wrong to read it.”</p>
<p>     Youngjae grabbed the paper. He sighed, and decided to lay down as well. Mark couldn’t help but stare at him as he seemed to read the paper over and over, maybe trying to find something wrong, something he missed that would have made it all a big misunderstanding. But the way his deskmate shut his eyes and placed the paper over his face proved that wasn’t the case.</p>
<p>     “What does it say?” Mark said quietly, as if he thought he had to be cautious with his words to not hurt him. The other paused, for a second Mark even though he hadn’t heard him.</p>
<p>     “I got accepted.” Youngjae said surprisingly firmly, considering the mess he was the night before. He handed the paper over to Mark, who took it as permission to read it. “When I got home the letter was opened and on the table. They wanted me to find it, they didn’t even wait for me to get home.”</p>
<p>     Marks eyes skimmed through the papers. There were slightly big words that he couldn’t really comprehend, but for the most part, he understood. “Wow, law school huh… That’s a big accomplishment, Youngjae.”</p>
<p>     He swore he heard Youngjae scoff. “Yeah, and the one my parents went to no less. All of a sudden I’m the son they’ve always wanted…” He trailed off, mostly talking to himself at this point. “What crap timing.”</p>
<p>     Mark stayed quiet, folding up the paper carefully as if it were a ticking time bomb and placing it on the desk again. He looked over at his friend, who was staring at the ceiling, his tongue pressed against the inside of his cheek. Minutes flew by like this, just Mark staring as Youngjae was deeply lost in thought. Mark was the one to break the silence.</p>
<p>     “You should tell them.” He said, still focused on his friend. Youngjae turned his head, finding Mark's gaze. He opened his mouth, but Mark cut him off. “Don’t. I know exactly what you’re going to say, but just don’t. I know you, and I can tell when you don’t want something.”</p>
<p>     And there it was, an expression on Youngjaes face so similar to the one from the night before, so lost, so broken.</p>
<p>     “What else am I supposed to do with my life, it’s all been planned out.” Youngjae said quietly, trying to look away but finding his gaze right back onto Mark's deep brown eyes. The latter smiled.</p>
<p>     “I mean it's obvious, you go to KNUA, they’ll give you that scholarship.”</p>
<p>     Youngjaes eyes widened slightly. “That’s not certain, besides I don’t--”</p>
<p>     Mark pushed the hairs off of Youngjaes forehead, making him choke on his words. “You know I don’t fall for that, I never did.” He spoke softly, in a tone Youngjae couldn’t quite understand, but the fluttering feeling in his stomach sure did. Mark found his eyes, his smile softening as he looked into Youngjae's very soul. “How many times did you have to pretend?”</p>
<p>     Youngjae gulped. “Pretend?”</p>
<p>     “That it didn’t hurt you… That you were fine…” He paused, noticing Youngjaes lip quiver for a slight second. “Don’t. Not with me.”</p>
<p>     Youngjae opened his mouth as if to say something, but was stopped as Mark's forehead pressed against his. He felt his chest tighten, as the air seemed to escape his lungs.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>Stop hiding from me…</b></strong>” Mark barely whispered, his voice shaking. Youngjae clenched his fist, feeling a hot tear slide down the side of his face and onto the bed under him. Something inside him, something he couldn’t control made him grab onto Mark, burying his face onto the blonde's chest. Mark didn’t even think about it and wrapped his arms around his friend, holding onto him tightly as he shook with silent sobs. He remembered the night before, how he had felt when Youngjae clung himself onto him, how his face grew hot as the scent of Youngjaes perfume hit his nose, and how he forced himself to push these feelings away because his friend needed him. Now, it didn’t feel that way, he felt like he could fully invest himself into this embrace, like he could enjoy the thing he’s wanted for so long. He couldn’t help but let out a relieved laugh, pressing his lips onto the top of Youngjaes head.</p>
<p>     The chestnut-haired boy flinched, but tightened his grip onto the smaller man, nothing was going to stop him from enjoying this moment; not college, not his parents, nothing.</p>
<p>     While this was going on, Youngjaes voice from the night before seemed to haunt the back of Mark's brain. He heard the pain in his voice as clearly as the night before. ‘<em>They won't let me go…</em>’</p>
<p>     “They’ll have to.” Mark said quietly, almost so that Youngjae couldn’t hear him. Almost.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     After a quick bathroom break, Youngjae walked downstairs. Mark was going to go start his day and then meet him to make some breakfast. He <em>had</em> told Youngjae to wait in his room, but after the half-hour they spent just locked in an embrace, he was too nervous to even go near his room.</p>
<p>     After spending a night, or well now two nights, in the Tuan residence, he was still always surprised at how big it actually was. He thought his own family was well off, but compared to this it was as if he lived in a suburb. He shook his head, pushing away those petty little thoughts. In the corner of his eye, he noticed his shoes at the doorstep, messily thrown next to Mark's neatly placed shoes. He felt his face redden with embarrassment, just how out of it was he that he just threw his shoes off like that in another person's home? He scurried over, passing by the door that leads to the kitchen. He hasn’t really been in there, but Mark gave them a little tour last time so he knew it was there. He squatted down at the door, grabbing his shoes. Now the question was, should he put them next to Marks? He paused, maybe he’d think he was weird… On the other side then?</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>Hello</b></strong>?” Youngjae froze with his shoes in his hands as a voice called behind him. He turned around as if he were in a horror movie, his heart feeling like it would burst out of his chest. But instead of a scary monster, he found a small, middle-aged woman, standing under the kitchen door’s frame. He blinked. Thinking back, Mark did say he had a housekeeper… He turned a bit towards her, still hunched over with his shoes in his hand. His voice came out almost a whisper.</p>
<p>     “G-good a--”</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>Mama, what’s wr</b></strong>--” Out from the door came a middle-aged man, who instantly stopped the second he saw Youngjae. The highschooler's face turned white as a ghost, as he realized that the pair that stood in front of him were no other than Mark's parents.</p>
<p>     “...Hello there.” The man said in Korean, with a bit of an accent. Youngjae stood up straight, meeting the man's eyes though his body was trying to convince him otherwise. The woman whispered to the older man in another language, Youngjaes brain was too cluttered to even try to understand which.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>Nice to meet you, M-my name is Choi Youngjae. Mark is my friend</b></strong>.” Youngjae managed to get out with just a few minor stutters from how nervous he was.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>Is Mark here</b></strong>?” Marks father asked in a slightly serious tone, but he looked at him with a warm expression, helping Youngjae calm down a bit.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>He is… In bathroom</b></strong>.”</p>
<p>     Marks father pressed his lips together, and walked towards Youngjae. They were about the same height, but Mr. Tuan did seem slightly BIGGER, making Youngjae a little uneasy. Mr. Tuan looked him up and down, analyzing him. Then, like something clicked in his brain, his face lit up. “<strong><b>Ah! You’re the one who was helping him with his Korean, right</b></strong>?”</p>
<p>     Youngjae blinked. “<strong><b>Y-yes</b></strong>.”</p>
<p>     The older man patted Youngjae on the back, hard enough that he dropped the shoes from his hands. “<strong><b>Meeting the legend himself! I don’t know how you did it, honestly</b></strong>.” He gave out a big hearty laugh.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>Oh, you must be starving</b></strong>!” Mrs. Tuan shuffled her way over, grabbing Youngjaes arms. “<strong><b>Come into the kitchen we’re making lunch</b></strong>!” Before he could even think of refusing, the smaller woman pulled him all the way into the kitchen, sitting him down on a stool at the kitchen counter.</p>
<p>     For a very modern looking home, the kitchen looked very cozy, something you’d imagine all of them in together, cooking as a family. It was adorned with colorful towels, a matching set of aprons on the wall, and a little tiny rooster statue, something about it kind of reminded him of Mark for some reason. Mrs. Tuan placed a plate in front of him, covered in savory, juicy meat and rice. So entranced and trying not to salivate, he almost forgot to thank her for it. The woman smiled as he did a shy little bow.</p>
<p>     Mr. Tuan sat in front of him on the other side of the counter-table with a plate of his own. He grabbed a pitcher of juice and served some for Youngjae, who quietly thanked him.</p>
<p>     “Ya, where did you g--” Mark walked past the kitchen door, and after a second, he walked backwards to look into the room. His eyes shifted from his mom, to his dad, to Youngjae, to the plate of food he was already grabbing with his fork, and then back to his parents. He spoke casually, not how you would if you had no idea your parents were home on a school day when you were playing hooky. “<strong><b>Hey mom, hey dad, what are you guys doing here</b></strong>?”</p>
<p>     His mom clanked his plate on the counter next to Youngjae. “<strong><b>We should be saying that! Why aren’t you in school?</b></strong>“ She playfully patted him as if she was hitting him.</p>
<p>     Mark pouted. “<strong><b>I overslept, sorry</b></strong>.” Youngjae hid a little chuckle as he sipped his juice.</p>
<p>     Mr. Tuan pointed a fork at Youngjae casually between mouthfuls. “<strong><b>Why didn’t you tell us your boyfriend was staying over</b></strong>?”</p>
<p>     Youngjae choked on his juice, covering his mouth with the back of his hand. Mr. Tuan gave his wife a playful look.</p>
<p>     Mark sat down on the stool next to Youngjaes, a bit too calmly. “<strong><b>It was last minute, you were already asleep and he needed a place to crash</b></strong>.”</p>
<p>     Youngjaes face turned bright red, he didn’t even try to deny it! He bumped his knee against Marks, who looked at him casually, resting an elbow on the table and holding his fork casually with the other hand. “What?” He asked, his intentions showing in his voice. Youngjae flinched, his face growing hotter by the second. A sly grin formed on Mark's lips before he focused back on his food.</p>
<p>      Maybe Jackson was right, maybe Mark really is a wild American boy.</p>
<p>     “Ha!!” Marks mother yelled out dramatically, putting her hand to her husband and saying something in Chinese with a triumphant voice. Mr. Tuan let his head drop in defeat, grabbing his wallet and pulling what looked like an American dollar bill, placing it on her hand as she wiggled happily.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>What the heck</b></strong>??” Mark yelled out, annoyed. “<strong><b>You did NOT place a freaking bet on that</b></strong>!” The Tuans laughed, Mark standing up and yelling at them playfully, something about leaving and putting himself up for adoption. Mrs. Tuan grabbed his cheek and cooed at him in Chinese.</p>
<p>     All Youngjae could do was stare and smile. Who would have thought Mark was this friendly with his parents? Or maybe… This was just what normal families were like?</p>
<p>     After the commotion calmed down, they all ate in somewhat silence, telling jokes from time to time and praising Mrs. Tuans cooking. After they finished eating, they just sat there chatting and drinking juice.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>So, Youngjae right?</b></strong>” Mr. Tuan called for Youngjae, who nodded politely. “<strong><b>Are you going to continue your studies</b></strong>?”</p>
<p>     Youngjae turned to Mark, with a slightly confused look as he didn’t understand just exactly what he was asking him. Mark only said one word to him: “College.” He sat up straight, ready to recite the sentence he would always tell his parent’s English-speaking colleagues at fancy dinner parties.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>I am going to La</b></strong>--” He stopped, as if the words got stuck in his throat. He stared down at his hands on his lap. Should he just say it? Admit to himself that he will do whatever his parents say? He tasted blood, he hadn’t even realized he was biting his tongue. Suddenly, he saw a hand slowly rub against his. Youngjae looked up to find Mark's gaze. Mark smiled softly, squeezing his hand firmly to comfort him. He didn’t even have to say it, Youngjae knew what he was thinking. It was now or never. “<strong><b>I’m going to study Music</b></strong>.”</p>
<p>     And it was out. Youngjae reached his foot down onto the floor, it hadn't crumbled under him. The world didn’t go black, the sky didn’t fall. Youngjae was okay, in fact, he was better than okay. Running through him was that same feeling he got when he finished playing the piano at Mark's sleepover, that feeling of euphoria that rushed through his veins. Mark squeezed his hand again, rubbing his thumb on the back of Youngjaes hand.</p>
<p>     Marks father stood up straight. “<strong><b>Oh, that’s so great</b></strong>!<strong><b> What instrument do you play</b></strong>?”</p>
<p>     Youngjae froze, as he felt a knot starting to form in his chest. He had just met him, but Mr. Tuan seemed so happy for him… He didn’t expect that to happen the day he’d admit he wanted to go against everything his parents ever wanted. He really didn’t think it would be so… accepted. “<strong><b>I-I play piano</b></strong>.”</p>
<p>     Mr. Tuan looked over at his wife, whose face lit up in excitement. “<strong><b>Mama, same as you</b></strong>!”</p>
<p>     Standing up, Mrs. Tuan grabbed Youngjaes hands. “<strong><b>Did you see my piano</b></strong>? <strong><b>Come come, let me show you</b></strong>!” She said pulling Youngjae off the stool and out of the kitchen before he could even react.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>Mom! He’s already</b></strong>… <strong><b>Aaaand they’re  gone</b></strong>.” Mark trailed off, drinking what was left of his juice.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>So, how long have you two been dating</b></strong>?” His father asks, patting him on the back.</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>Well… That was kind of the first time I’ve ever mentioned it.</b></strong>”</p>
<p>     Mr. Tuan chuckled, patting his son on the back. “<strong><b>Just like your old man, I did the same thing to your Mama. Oof you should have seen how red she got haha. Anyway, you two seem pretty close, I’m glad.”</b></strong></p>
<p>     Marks face softened. “<strong><b>We’ve been through a lot together, and… there are still things we need to get through…</b></strong>”</p>
<p>     A lively tune started playing through the house, grabbing their attention. Mrs. Tuans voice was heard from a distance. “<strong><b>OH THIS IS HOW DEBUSSY WAS MEANT TO BE HONORED</b></strong>!!”</p>
<p>     “<strong><b>Mama’s getting excited, we should go calm her down before she adopts your boyfriend</b></strong>.” Mr. Tuan laughed, putting an arm around Mark's shoulders and pulling him out of the kitchen. And just like the first time he heard it, that word made his stomach go crazy, and he hoped his face hadn’t turned red.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     Youngjae ended up staying the whole afternoon with the Tuans, just joking around and playing song after song. After the stressful day he had yesterday, he really needed this. They laughed with him, got excited whenever he would play a different song, and even sang along to some of them like they were drunk at karaoke. He sat on the bus, smiling to himself remembering the good time he had, and how he knew it would all go away the moment he stepped off the bus.</p>
<p>     The Tuans seemed like the families on TV, bright and cheerful, encouraging and highly supportive. Youngjae always thought families like that didn’t exist, what with his own family and Jinyoung's being the only ones he really knew. Any kid would believe that's the norm.</p>
<p>     The bus came to a complete stop in the entrance to his neighborhood. Youngjae took a second, thinking to himself about how he could just stay on the bus, let it take him far away from the empty house that waited for him, both literally and figuratively. It wasn’t the first time he’s thought this, no even since he was a child he’d imagine running away and not looking back. He sighed, telling himself the same thing he had so many times: He’d have nowhere to go…</p>
<p>     Stepping off the bus and into the cold winter afternoon, Youngjae made his way through his childhood neighborhood. Soon he would graduate and be off to university, so he wouldn't have to go down this road anymore. The thought made him nostalgic, but all in all, he was happy. It wasn’t until he saw his parent's car in the driveway that his heart completely sank. It wasn’t even dark out, what were they doing home?</p>
<p>     He made it to the front door, taking a deep breath before swinging it open. The bright lights from inside were such a contrast to the usual dark home he’d arrive to, and the smell of delicious food nearly slapped him in the face. He shut the door behind him, instantly taking his shoes off out of habit.</p>
<p>     “Youngjae! Welcome home!” Youngjae flinched as his mother popped out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on her apron.</p>
<p>     “Hey, there’s the man of the hour!” His dad came from the living room, patting Youngjae on the back.</p>
<p>     “What are you two doing home so early?” He blinked, staring at both of them as a knot grew in the pit of his stomach.</p>
<p>     His father pulled him over to the table, which was covered in plates and pots of delicious-looking food. “We took half the day off, we had to come home and celebrate!” Youngjae looked down at the feast in front of him, swallowing hard as the memories of him constantly having to eat ramen for dinner clouded his mind. It was weird, he wasn’t used to this. Mr. Choi sat down, his wife taking a seat straight in front of him.</p>
<p>     Youngjae paused, staying quiet as his parents motioned for him to sit down. He hated it. It was so fake, so repulsing. The smiles on their faces… Is that what Youngjae looked like when he faked being happy in front of his friends? He felt his stomach turn.</p>
<p>     Youngjae gulped. No use in putting it off, he had to rip it off like a band-aid. “I got accepted into another school.”</p>
<p>     His father laughed, as if Youngjae was a child worrying about something silly. “It’s okay, you got accepted into our university, you don’t have to worry about other scho--”</p>
<p>     “I want to enroll there, at KNUA. They offered me a scholarship.” He interrupted, which might have been a bad idea.</p>
<p>     But his parents weren't affected. Instead, they both looked at their plates as if Youngjae never said anything. They stayed quiet for a bit too long. His mother smiled. “Your hard work really paid off, we’re very pro—”</p>
<p>     “I want to study music.”</p>
<p>     His mother looked at Mr. Choi, who was staring at Youngjae, daggers in his eyes. “Not everybody gets accepted into law sch—”</p>
<p>     “I want to study music.” He repeated, firmer than before.</p>
<p>     “Music!” His father scoffed, his voice loud. “Of all things.”</p>
<p>     “I <em>like</em> making music dad,” He continued, certainty in his voice. “I don’t want to become a lawyer.”</p>
<p>     Mr. Choi threw his chopsticks on the table, his voice rising in anger. “You haven’t even touched the piano in years, it's just a giant, dusty fire hazard in our fucking living room!”</p>
<p>     Mrs. Choi panicked, putting a hand towards her husband in an attempt to calm him down. “What your father is trying to say is--!” She paused, her eyes flickering as she was trying to make something up. “Youngjae, we have a plan remember?”</p>
<p>     “You have a plan, I never wanted any of it.” His face was nearly blank, all signs of fear or nerves left him, and instead, anger grew in his chest.</p>
<p>     “How about you calm down and we’ll talk about it later?” She continued, trying to de-escalate the situation.</p>
<p>     “There’s nothing to talk about. I’ve made up my mind.” Youngjae stood his ground, for the first time in his life.</p>
<p>     “This punk…” His father growled between his teeth. “You think you know better than your parents??”</p>
<p>     Youngjae scoffed, completely baffled. “Did you know I didn’t go to school today?”</p>
<p>     “What?”</p>
<p>     He continued, his voice slightly cracking as a harsh knot grew in his throat. “I didn’t go. Didn’t you see my bag? It’s under the table, I saw it on my way in. I didn’t even sleep here tonight, did you know that?”</p>
<p>     “What are you trying to say??”</p>
<p>     “I’m saying your son wasn’t home last night, and it's not the only time it's happened. And all those times, you’ve never noticed.”</p>
<p>     “So what, you're rebelling? Is that your point??” His father laid back on his chair, looking at him with fire in his eyes.</p>
<p>     Youngjae scoffed, no, he downright laughed at his father. “My point is you don’t even know or care if your only son made it home safely, if he ate dinner, if he's sick or beaten up!” His voice grew, until he was yelling out at both of them, hot angry tears streaming down his face. “You don’t even bother to include him at the morning table! How the fuck are you supposed to know what's best for him??”</p>
<p>     His father stands up abruptly, and pain crosses through Youngjaes face as Mr. Choi slaps him with the back of his hand. Mrs. Choi gasps. Youngjae stares at the wall, his cheek stinging and red. “You’re in my house, you follow my rules.” He nearly growls, sitting back down. “Go study, finals are coming up.” Finals had already passed, not that it mattered.</p>
<p>     Youngjae stood there for a second, then walked off with a blank expression. He reached the entrance to the hallway and stopped, his back to his parents.</p>
<p>     “One day… When I’m out there living my life and you try to call me…” He paused, staring off into the hallway. “Don’t be surprised when I don’t answer.”</p>
<p>     The room stayed quiet, and after a second, the only sound they heard was Youngjae's door shutting and locking.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p>
  
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>     Jinyoung laid on his bed, eyes glued onto his phone screen in complete shock. What was happening? How did the Phoenix get this information? He sat up, dialing his friend's number, his foot shaking anxiously as it kept ringing and ringing. He flinched when he heard his friend's voice.</p>
<p>     “<em>What do you want?</em>” Yugyeom whined. Behind his voice, there was music and people laughing like crazy.</p>
<p>     “Where are you??”</p>
<p>     “<em>Why would you ne-need to know that Park Jinyoung-ssi?</em>” he slurred his words, ending the sentence with an odd exhale that sounded like a laugh.</p>
<p>     “Yugyeomie, are you drunk??”</p>
<p>     “<em>Whatever.--</em>” The call cut off, but it didn’t matter. Jinyoung knew exactly where he was.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>...</p>
<p> </p>
<p>     Jinyoung rushed down the dark streets of downtown, huffing out white clouds from the cold air around him. His shoes tapped loudly on the sidewalk as he approached his destination. In front of him was his old friend's bar, a bouncer standing cross-armed in front of the door. Jinyoung extended his arm to give him a handshake, sliding a ₩50,000 note into his hand. The bouncer pats him on the back, and Jinyoung entered the building.</p>
<p>     The bar was packed, people laughing and enjoying themselves. Jinyoung scanned the area and found his target. Yugyeom sat at the bar, knocking down a shot like it was water. He couldn’t help but scoff, not too long ago Yugyeom would grimace at just the thought of alcohol, and now here he was getting drunk off his ass. He walked over to the bar, pulling Yugyeom's arm to get him off the stool. The bartender smiled at him.</p>
<p>     “No more for him, Hyung. I'm taking him home.” Jinyoung said to the bartender, whom he’s known for years.</p>
<p>     “What a buzz-kill.” Yugyeom rolled his eyes, stumbling as Jinyoung pulled him through the crowd.</p>
<p>     “Last time we came here you were too scared to drink anything, now you’re flat out drunk??”</p>
<p>     “Oh bite me Park Jinyoung.” He said pulling his arm away and walking out himself.</p>
<p>     They left the bar, Yugyeom patting the bouncers arm on his way out. He sat down on the pavement beside the road, tongue pressing onto his cheeks while he has a sly grin. “So I’m guessing you saw the Phoenix’s post.”</p>
<p>     “Is it true?” Jinyoung put his his hands in his pockets.</p>
<p>     “Does it matter?”</p>
<p>     Jinyoung let his head fall back, a bit baffled. “How is it that they always know what's going on?! Its freaking insane.”</p>
<p>     “Yeah completely bonkers.” The drunk high schooler said in monotone.</p>
<p>     “Listen Yugyeom, I’m going to find who it is, I’ll make them pay for this.”</p>
<p>     “Oh boy, my hero.” He responded sarcastically, shaking his hands in front of him.</p>
<p>     “I mean it okay, this is really messed up. Nobody should be outed like that just because they li--”</p>
<p>     “Just stop.” Yugyeoms tone changed. He looked up to Jinyoung, suddenly completely serious. “It’s me, I’m the Phoenix.”</p>
<p>     His friend stared at him, annoyed at his drunk bullshit. “Stop making up nonsense.”</p>
<p>     Yugyeom pulled out his phone, tapping on it and then handing it to him. Jinyoung grabbed it, his eyes widening as it was on the Phoenix’s Twitter page. He wasn’t lying.</p>
<p>     “Yugyeomie… How could you--” He paused, realizing “Wait, YOU were the one who told everybody about me, about the clinic??”</p>
<p>     “And look where you are now.” Yugyeom grinned, a bit somberly. “Be as angry as you want but if it wasn’t for me we’d still be beating up Youngjae in an alleyway while you were secretly sticking your tongue down Jaebum's throat.”</p>
<p>     “You motherfucker” Jinyoung said between his teeth, grabbing Yugyeom by the collar and pulling him up to his feet. “I thought you were my friend!”</p>
<p>     “I am, why do you think I did it??” He stared at Jinyoung, trying not to get flustered by how close he was. “For shits and giggles? If I hadn’t stepped in, nothing would have changed! It had to happen.”</p>
<p>     ‘<em>It had to happen</em>.’ repeated in Jinyoungs head. He let go of Yugyeom's shirt, the latter stumbling back a bit before regaining composure. How could he be angry, he had done the same thing to Youngjae. Doing shady things to help their friends, they were both messed up. He decided to change the subject to a more pressing matter.</p>
<p>     “So… You outed yourself?” He almost whispered, confusion clouding his mind. “Why?”</p>
<p>     Yugyeom chuckled to himself. “Maybe I’m a sucker for punishment? Or maybe it was only fair… I fucked with my friend's life, I should have the same thing done to me.”</p>
<p>     An imaginary arrow went through Jinyoung, but he ignored it. “Any other reason?”</p>
<p>     Yugyeom paused, slowly sitting back down on the pavement. “...To get over it? I think that might be the winner. After so many years, it's time to face the facts and just let it go.”</p>
<p>     Jinyoung stared at his friend as his face seemed to somber. He sighed quietly, sitting next to him. Of course, he was with Jaebum, he could never reciprocate Yugyeoms feelings. “I'm sorry, Yugyeom.”</p>
<p>     “I knew you’d be.” He smiled, almost a bit playfully. “Kinda sucks that now you know I’m the Phoenix, I loved one-upping everybody, feeling like I was some powerful god that was better than everybody else.”</p>
<p>     “Can I say something?” Jinyoung interrupted, not even giving him a chance to answer. “To me, it just feels like you were hiding. Putting the spotlight on others so you wouldn't catch any attention.”</p>
<p>     Yugyeom scoffed. “That sounds familiar to me.”</p>
<p>     A grin appeared on Jinyoungs face. Of course they were so similar, they were best friends. He sighed, a bit somber. “Jaebum was right, we’re all so selfish… Why are we all hiding our true intentions?”</p>
<p>     Yugyeom sighed. “I guess we just need to grow up.”</p>
<p>     “Should we then? Graduate and leave all this plotting and secrecy behind us?”</p>
<p>     “How did me confessing become a pact to change ourselves?” Yugyeom whined playfully. Jinyoung laughed, pushing him with his elbow. Yugyeom smiled, nothing made him happier than seeing his friend laugh. No matter how much he wanted to get over it all, there’s one thing that would never change.</p>
<p>     No matter what, he’ll always do what Park Jinyoung says.</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p>     Youngjae buttoned up his uniform. Another school day was about to start, but that was alright. Next week, winter break would start. And then just two months later, Youngjae would be graduating with all his friends. He smiled into the mirror, ignoring the little bruise on his cheek from where his father's ring had hit. He had never thought that could even happen. All those years on his own, he’d imagine himself alone at graduation, his parents probably would have been working that day. But now, he really had something to look forward to.</p>
<p>     He grabbed his bag, looking at himself one more time in the mirror before exiting his room. Walking down the hallway, he heard the clutter of his mom in the kitchen. Once he reached the dining area, he found his father sitting at the table, not even bothering to look at him. Youngjae adjusted his backpack and walked past him, off to put on his shoes.</p>
<p>     “Youngjae.” His mom called, standing at the door to the kitchen. “Are you going to join us for breakfast?”</p>
<p>     Youngjae stared at them, a bit baffled. It was as if they were both just ignored what happened the night before. “No thanks, you never have a space for me there anyway.” He walked out the door and shut it behind him.</p>
<p>     It was cold out. Winter had come and it had no mercy. Youngjae loved the cold weather, so he wasn’t too bothered by it. He walked through the gate, turning around to close it.</p>
<p><strong><em><b>     AH-CHOO!</b></em></strong>Youngjae jumped at the sudden sneeze that popped out of nowhere. He looked towards the sidewalk, finding none other than his deskmate Tuan Mark wiggling in the cold with his hands in his pockets. Suddenly, Youngjae was no longer cold.</p>
<p>     “Y-you nearly scared me half to death!!” Youngjae yelled out, approaching the smaller man. Mark smiled, turning to him. “What are you doing freezing your butt off here?”</p>
<p>     “I don’t know, I woke up with the urge of walking with you to school.” Mark couldn’t contain a giggle, thinking he was oh so smooth.</p>
<p>     Youngjae smacked the boy's arm, for more than one reason. “Your house is closer to school you should have just waited at the bus stop near school! How long have you been waiting??”</p>
<p>     “Not long really, it's no big deal.” Mark didn’t want to tell him he had even seen the sunrise. “Let’s go, its cold.”</p>
<p>     They walked side by side, the cool winter air and the gray skies giving them a relaxing atmosphere. They talked about random things, new games coming out, Mark’s parents going off on another trip, how inspired his mom was to play after Youngjae left, and of course, eventually, of what happened the night before. Mark was quiet as Youngjae spoke about it, unable to ignore the small bruise on his cheekbone from what he assumed to be his father's ring.</p>
<p>     They made it to the bus stop, sitting on the bench side to side. They had been a while, walking so slow that they missed Youngjaes usual bus, so they had to wait fifteen minutes for the next one. The streets were surprisingly empty, only proving that winter break was just around the corner. Mark kicked around the little pebbles on the floor, trying to think of what to say to him.</p>
<p>     “I’m here for you, y'know.” Mark broke the silence. “Whatever happens, I’m on your side.”</p>
<p>     Youngjae smiled warmly, Mark swore he saw stars glimmer in his eyes. “I know.”</p>
<p>     “M-my parents too!” Mark stuttered, a bit flustered. “Dad said mom was so close to adopting you, haha…”</p>
<p>     “Hmm, that doesn’t sound so bad.” Youngjae said playfully, staring at the gray clouds pretending to think. “Your house is big enough, I’m sure you’d have a room for me, huh Hyung?”</p>
<p>     Marks eyes widened. “Ya, why are you calling me that!! We’re the same age!”</p>
<p>     “Yeah but you’re still older than me.” Youngjae stuck his tongue out, he loved teasing him.</p>
<p>     “By like a couple days!” Mark complained, stifling a laugh. He pushed Youngjaes arm, who laughed with his whole body.</p>
<p>     It was nice, they both thought, after so many days of stressing out they could have moments like this. Youngjae sighed, looking back at the gray sky. His breath formed a white cloud in front of him, disappearing almost instantly. Mark couldn’t help but stare, a happy flutter forming in his stomach as his friend smiled so warmly in this freezing weather. He’s glad, that at least when they're together, he can give Youngjae a reason to smile.</p>
<p>     “We should go somewhere.” Youngjae broke the silence, eyes still glued to the sky. “It’s such a pretty day, lets go somewhere after school.”</p>
<p>     Mark stuffed his hands into his pockets, trying to avoid grimacing over the thought that Youngjae thought this cold, gray day was ‘pretty’. “Where do you want to go then?”</p>
<p>     “Actually, it’s not exactly a place that I want to go to.” Youngjae pressed his lips together, looking at Mark. “There’s just something I’ve always wanted to do.”</p>
<p> </p>
<hr/>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>

<p></p><blockquote>
  <p>Hi! Meli here C:<br/><br/>Thank you so much for reading my AU! The story is now up to date with what I had posted on Twitter. I went on an extremely long hiatus, but I will finish it soon. I want to finish before starting the next one.</p>
  <p>Once the next chapter is done I'll update it C: I'll also notify it on Twitter so if you haven't then please follow me @kship_au</p>
  <p> </p>
  <p>Thank's again!<br/>~Melipierocks</p>
</blockquote>
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